I can remember the pain like it was yesterday. The end of my first love. I was in high school and we had been together for two years. It was an obsessive, unhealthy, passionate young love. (No wonder I write YA romance! :)
A heart breaking, is an incredibly real, physical occurance. So painful you want to die. It squeezes the breath from your lungs and buckles your knees.
Yet...I don't regret it for one moment. Is it crazy to say that I only hope my children someday have the gift of first love and heartbreak? It doesn't feel right to think it. But still, that experience molds you. It's made me a better wife to my "true" love. The experience is so raw that it is truly the feeling of being alive. In my experience...there is no other feeling quite as devastating as someone choosing to stop loving you. In some ways, to drown in that sorrow is the epitome of being human.
I remember days on end of laying on my bed, (my poor mother didn't know what to do!!) and listening to the most depressing songs. On repeat. Crying until my face swelled and no tears were left.
This was one of them. Listening to it, I remember the pain like it was yesterday.
4 months ago
