My Writing Blog

Music and Twitter

2012-03-06T05:45:00.002-08:00

In the past week I have written nearly 10,000 words. yay! That makes me incredibly proud of myself. I have absolutely no doubt that I'm on track for my birthday/The End celebration at the end of the month. (Finally told my husband about it...he's cool!)

For the last couple of days, I've written along side some music. Never done that before. I usually need complete silence. Occasionally I can write with my husband watching t.v. but that is a huge distraction for me.

Part of it, I think, were that the songs were either playing in the scenr, or my characters look was "inspired" by the artist. It was tremendously helpful and inspiring. Do you play with music? I know some people write with headphones in. Hmmmm, I'd be willing to try it but don't think I could do it often.

Also, almost a year to the day I posted about "should I or shouldn't I " regarding Twitter. I ended up joining that day, just to get my name, but I didn't tweet until yesterday! Crazy?! It felt kind of good. Don't know if I can maintain it very well, but we shall see.

Okay, off to write my butt off.

Well said

2012-03-02T06:01:00.000-08:00

I'm going to assume I'm the last to the party on this, but have you read Laini Taylor's blog Not for Robots?

Good Gosh, a few paragraphs in and I was on board. She could have sold me on just about anything. I was in her world, she was speaking to me. No ones thoughts on writing have resonated with me like these.

Like I said, I'm sure you've seen it, but if not...brace yourself. I've been completely reinvigorated and inspired. My feelings and process have also been validated.

I'll tell you what, if she wasn't already an amazing published author (hello Amazon top 10 of 2011!!) and I was an agent that stumbled across these little essays on writing?? I would sign her on these words alone. Truth. Such amazing stuff.

www.notforobots.blogspot.com

The Power of Consistency

2012-03-01T06:07:00.002-08:00

I'm not sure why I'm writing about this. Consistency is a subject I really know NOTHING about. It's my weakness, but if I could change one thing about myself, it would be this. I'm not good at follow through. I'm bad...bad, bad, bad at it.

However, I've decided I'd like to finish my ms by my birthday which happens to be March 31st. So, if you're date savvy, you know that is in exactly 31 days. One full month.

The way I know I will get there, is that I actually have been consistent about writing everyday. Whoulda thunk? It really does work. (I knew it would, I just suck sometimes.) Which begs the question....can I only be consistent with something if it is giving me something in return? No. Because washing my sheets every Friday would bring me lots of joy...and I cant' seem to commit to that. (I just shared too much...don't go!!!)

I'm not sure why I—suck at consistency girl—have been able to achieve this. I think it might have something to do with THE END. There is no end in sight to washing my sheets every Friday, or making sure every dish is washed before I jump into bed with a good book. Those things will plague me until I die. And the reward will NEVER CHANGE. But finishing this novel...I can feel it. I want to experience that never-again-feeling of finishing my first novel.

Does that make sense? But I really wish that I could be better about those things.

Two questions. Do you write everyday, consistently? I'm talking, same place, same time, same.

Are you good at routine in your daily life outside of writing? Does it come naturally? How can I be more like you?? Please don't say, "You just do it." I know that's right, but it's clearly not working.

I'll wash my sheets tomorrow. Swear.

Paid in Full

2012-02-28T07:06:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a wonderful day. I paid off a whopper of a fine to my local public library. I love to buy books, but I'm a readaholic. Our budget doesn't support my habit to the fullest, so I have to borrow. Well, I used to borrow. I hadn't been to the library in about a year because I owed them $. Ridiculous? yes. It started with the usual. Overdue fees, etc. Then the biggie…my three boys accidentally destroyed one of those big Star Wars encyclopedia books. Sigh.

Why are replacing books for the library more expensive than just buying it at Barnes and Nobles or Target?? That whole "reshelving" thing? I don't know. But finally that's all behind me, and yesterday my youngest and I walked into the library and took a good, deep breath! Ahhhhh. It felt so good. We loaded our arms with books of all sorts, picture books, graphic novels, chapter books, YA. It was bliss. We checked out without question...YAY! Then, I came home and filled my online hold list with every book imaginable. In a few days I'm going to be walking out of there with a serious bag of books. (Our library system in KC is quite impressive considering I live in a tiny country suburb.)

I was thrilled to find that my small library had a book on the shelf that I had really been wanting to read.

While googling this, I discovered that Selena Gomez is said to be playing in the movie of this. I like her, no haters please. Did anyone else know there was a movie being made?? Very cool.

Some of the titles that will be mine in a few days!! SQUEEE!!!

What is everyone else reading??

Monday, once again!

2012-02-27T08:45:00.000-08:00

As a child and teen, I hated Monday. HATED it. I'm sure many can relate. Now that I'm a mother, that for the most part works at home....I LOVE IT!

Monday means me time. After a stressful, busy weekend I get to take my time into my own hands.

And do whatever the heck I want.

So, here I sit, at my laptop considering all the possibilities.

laundry.
writing
reading
cleaning the kitchen from breakfast
feeding the dog
going back to bed.
A little of all of the above until it's time to make dinner.

Yep, I'll stick with that last one.

Oh, for the very nice people that commented on my little boy having pneumonia, he is doing much better!!
Still sore and taking it easy, but he did go to school today (kindergarten) after missing all last week! Phew, tired much?!? (me, that is!)

I'll leave you with two fantastic (according to me) commercials that some of you may have already seen, but we saw this weekend in the theatre when we finally took the boys to see Star Wars 3D. The writer in me got a kick out of these two!! :)

Happy Monday!

 UPDATE
UPDATE!! I can't find, or remember the second video and I've spent over two hours searching youtube. My mind has drawn a blank. It's a boy and girl on a bridge in Central Park I think...and he says he has to leave her because he's a vampire or something and then she says I'm a "something" and then they banter back and forth between them one upping on the mythical creatures. Does anyone know this one? My brain is aching trying to remember what company it's for. ERGHHHHHH!!!

What a mess!

2012-02-24T08:03:00.003-08:00

How in the world does one keep a manuscript in order? I have file, after file, after file. They go a little something like this.

title of ms
title of ms 1
title of ms 2
title of ms painful cuts
painful cuts might use
all new title of ms
really new title of ms

How are we really supposed to keep it in order? I'm always in a panic state thinking that I'm opening the wrong file or saving the wrong file or afraid to delete any of them, lest I do something tragic!

Yesterday I was reading someone's blog...I really wish I could remember who's it was. I think it was Tamara Ireland Stone. I think!! Anyway, they (Tamara??) was saying they used Scrivener. When I went to the website and read about it, I fell a little bit in love with the idea. I haven't pulled the trigger on the 30 day trial, but I intend to do so very shortly! The way it works seems like a polished version of my lame envelope system. Like a digital companion to my very convoluted brain!

Has anyone used Scrivener or something similar??

Choosing Beta's

2012-02-23T06:53:00.000-08:00

How do you choose your beta readers?? I'm not quite there, but I've started thinking about it. I want someone who will be brutally honest, but constructive. How does everyone else choose??

Oh, and how many do you give it to? Do you let friends read it? Family?

Also, I found a great new blog today via Jessica Love, and it's featuring a contest with a great review! Go check it out here —Carolina Valdez Miller.The prize is a SIGNED copy of this...

Such a beautiful day today, although my baby has a severe case of pneumonia. :( That breaks my heart, but he sits here propped up in my bed with a humidifier as I sit at the computer and write. Making the best of a cruddy situation. Back to work!! :)

It's 2012!!

2012-02-22T12:51:00.000-08:00

Sadly, this is my first post of 2012!

ACK!

It's shameful, but I'm already over it.

I have missed blogging! I have missed bloggers. I have missed writers!! But I have not missed writing because I've been writing my butt off! That is the upside of my lack of blogging.

I had been nursing my wip for way. too. long. It was going nowhere fast. I was totally pantsing it. But something clicked a few weeks ago. I gave into a feeling I was having about this wip and it opened the floodgates. The writing was coming easy and it felt so good!! (Don't we LOVE that!)

Then one day I was overcome with an intense urge to plot it out. So I did...on about 20 envelopes. An envelope a chapter. I literally grabbed them off my desk and scribbled them out before the feeling passed. It has changed things for me. Having this—albeit crude—outline has made everyday writing a no brainer.

Here is the key.....

I know what is supposed to happen.

Seems obvious doesn't it?? But I realize for a long time I didn't know! It was all feelings and theories. But it was not a plot. I pray that the next book I write will not require the marinating time that this one did. Please tell me that it gets easier. That ideas come quicker, that concepts come together faster!! Anyone???

It's the most wonderful time....of the year!!!!!!!!!

2011-11-28T12:40:00.001-08:00

Wow. What a long, long, long Fall season.

Ever since I started my photography business nearly four years ago, Fall has been rough for me. I am gone almost the whole weekend with sessions and weddings, I'm editing all week, designing Christmas Cards, filling orders, going to the bank, designing albums, having viewing sessions during weeknights, making phone calls, not cleaning my house, barely getting meals made, working my body down until I'm sick. Yes, I've gotten a HORRIBLE ugly cold midway through the season every year. My immune system just cant handle the stress.

Why do I continue to do it? Well, somewhere in that stress I'm enjoying myself. Yeah, really. It makes me feel good to make so many people happy. It's nuts, but there aren't pretty fall leaves around all year buster. And fall is when seniors are turning in yearbook photos. It's also the "new" favorite time for weddings. It's just the way it is. The other reason is we have bills to pay. It sucks, but it's the way the cookie crumbles around here. You have to bulk up the checkbook before the enivitable "downtime" that follows in January and February.

This downtime of which I speak is what I keep my sights set on during this chaos. It is my beautiful shining light off in the distance. I follow it like a mirage. I just keep going one step at a time knowing it awaits me.

That time is about to start. By the end of this week—fingers crossed peeps—it will be upon me. The first part of it will be me preparing for Christmas and spending well deserved time with my boys and husband. They have put up with my stress and crazy. THEN, I will be writing!

In January I'm doing my own NaNo. Because OBVIOUSLY, November is just out of the question for me. Out. So, January it is.

I think I'll call it NuYeReNoWriMo

New Years Resolution Novel Writing Month. Yes, clearly I just made that up.

But whatever, I'm going strong. Oh, and very good news for you that have graciously followed my progress in the past. A miracle happened. My crit group gals invited me to a NaNo writing session they had right before Thanksgiving. I WENT, and GUESS WHAT????

I WROTE THAT KISSING SCENE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

If you just checked back in and read this, I thank you so very much! :) xoxo

A day of Hello Kitty's...for no reason.

2011-10-25T10:31:00.000-07:00

Except that I like them and I need a break from working! :)

http://petergvdesign.blogspot.com/


Joseph Senor- Designer

Okay, back to work for me!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some scenery.

2011-10-10T07:03:00.000-07:00

Fall is here! I started this rainy morning off with some Pumpkin Spice creamer in my coffee and some mindless internet perusing. Love it. The only downside is that I'm nursing my THIRD child with strep in the past two weeks. No bueno. I'm hoping that I don't get it.

I've got a bazillion photos to edit today, but wanted to take a minute to share a few of our D.C. pics. I know many are of things you've seen before but oh well. They are beautiful landmarks. Happy Monday! :)

*Edited to add that WOW, I looked at these photos on my main computer and they are really bright and saturated. sorry bout that. I edited them quickly on my laptop that isn't color calibrated. Sheesh.*

Fords Theater

Our hotel room! I had to take a picture and this is a fraction of a second after me screaming..."DON'T TOUCH THE PILLOWS, I have to take a picture!!!!!!!!" My husband is giving me the 'are you kidding me?' face. Happy 10th Anniversary!! haha

The view out of our hotel room! I wanted to go into that church so badly, but we didn't get a chance.

Some Random Thoughts....

2011-10-04T07:16:00.000-07:00

So, my husband and I are back from our whirlwind trip to D.C. I plan on sharing some pics soon, but haven't even loaded them up to my computer. I just wanted to share a few thoughts that have been bouncing around in my head about the trip.

First, am I the only writer who immediately wants to tell a story with the setting of their vacation spot? It's amazing being introduced to a whole new place!! A lot of my writing deals with small town middle America, so being thrown into cities, subways, and homeless people gave me a million ideas to play around with. (uhhhh....not now though. I've got a current ms to finish!! ugh!)

Second, I realize I'm kind of a country mouse. I do, however, have a city girl deep inside me. I love the energy and the movement. My husband? Not so much. I don't think I could always live in a city like that, but I can definitely see the appeal for different seasons of life. If I was young and single? Yes, please.

Third, there are some serious rules about city life that you need to learn QUICKLY. Don't worry about learning before you go, you'll figure it out right off! First being, just because there is an escalator taking you up out of the subway does NOT mean you should stand there and let it do it's job. You'd better move your slow butt over to the right side and get out of everyone elses way!

Also, do NOT make eye contact with the very strange people leaning against the wall talking to themselves. They will start to talk to you, and it is very uncomfortable.

Lastly, the transition of people getting off the subway while people get on is a "every man out for himself" affair. You better shove your way in or out!

Being from the midwest the tendency is to be kind and say "excuse me," and get out of someones way. I now realize why people come here and say everyone is so friendly. I don't think it's necessarily because big city or east coast people are rude, it's just that they have learned to just disregard the bumping, elbowing and shoving that comes with getting where you need to go in the city. I don't know, just a theory.

At the end of the day, I LOVED D.C. It was touching, beautiful, and awe inspiring. Full of history and amazing stories. If you go, I highly recommend taking a tour from Tim of Walk Of The Town tours. He was incredible! We learned so much from him and totally enjoyed the experience way more than we would have on our own!

If you haven't been to D.C., you should go!!

How do you deal?

2011-09-26T07:42:00.000-07:00

With stress, that is?

I've learned to anticipate stress during the Fall busy months of my business, but it still pulls the rug out from under me every year. The last few weeks particularly because I'm prepping for my husband and I to go to D.C. on Thursday. For some reason I get very stressed out before I go out of town. Anyone else?

My problem being, that I know I will enjoy the trip WAY MORE if I leave caught up on work. Oh, AND have my house clean. When you add all of these elements together...I'm running around like a crazy person trying to get everything done. Why do I feel the need to have my house clean when I leave? I mean, I know why, I want to come home to it clean. But what is the deal with that? I don't come home to it clean when I leave to run to the store?!

My question is this...what do you do to relieve your stress? I mean little things, like at the end of the day. Read? Watch TV? Get your nails done? Have a stiff drink? And also, how do you deal with the stress of a lot to do? Do you make a list? Start with little things and work up, or start with big things and work down? Just crawl in bed and take a nap? (tempting) My natural response is too shut down when pressure overwhelms me. I fight that because obviously I have too.

It's during times like these that I remember back to being a teenager and wanting nothing more than to be an adult so my life would be awesome! What are we thinking then?

Please don't leave!

2011-09-14T18:11:00.000-07:00

I want to apologize for the recent and future lack of posts here on this blog. I love that so many of you obviously check in and comment! I love you!!!! However, my "pay the bills job" as a photographer is getting into it's CRAZY season. Therefore my writing takes a serious backseat. I'm not going to quit posting altogether, but definitely less frequently. So please still check in....I don't want to lose you!

Now think of me as I come into the season of stress, christmas card design, endless hours of back and forth emailing and WAY TOO MUCH TIME in Photoshop. Phew. I'm already tired. I'll be so happy when it's Thanksgiving!! :) (The beauty is that January and February are very slow.... lots of coffee, cozy reading and writing! yay!)

All right Stop, Collaberate and Listen....

2011-09-07T07:51:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry about that. My only excuse is that the DJ at Saturdays wedding played that song (?) and I have NOT been able to get it out of my head. I've sang that line to my poor dog about 10 times since Saturday. It's not pretty. (Don't even pretend you didn't know EXACTLY where that line came from peeps!)

Moving on.

I've learned a few things these past 48 DAYS THAT I HAVE NOT BEEN READING. I'd like to share them with you.

1. It's confirmed. I read too much. Yes, I really do. The past few weeks I have had so much time vacant it's unbelievable. Have I filled that vacant time with writing? NO. We'll get to that later.

2. One addiction is cured by replacing it with another. One word. Pinterest.

3. I enjoy other things besides reading. I rediscovered other sides of myself long forgotten.

4. I get a lot more sleep when I don't read. No surprise.

5. Setting unobtainable goals does not help, it is detrimental. It creates, at least for me, a viscous cycle of failure, self loathing, and avoidance. Not good.

6. Linking my ability to read with my writing is just straight up dumb. I can't write without reading. The longer I went without reading, the less I wanted to write. It was like telling a runner, "You can't wear you fancy running shoes until you can run a 10K!". It was a stupid mistake. I shall never make it again.

7. I do have the ability to NOT read if necessary. This surprised me. I am stronger than I realized.

8. I will be reading soon. Maybe tonight, maybe this weekend. But soon.

In the meantime, I will be frying MC's like a pound of bacon.

A BIG DEAL!

2011-08-25T14:33:00.000-07:00

I can share this with ya'll because you will understand! If I told many people this they would be like "Oh good," and then think "what a weirdo". But I have great news today.

MY STORY NOW HAS AN ENDING!!!!!!!!!!!

That doesn't mean I have written the ending. It means I have found the ending. The ending is always hard for me. The fact that I know how this is all going to end is such a great feeling. I know exactly what direction each remaining chapter should take and WHY!

Please tell me you understand why this makes me so happy!? YAY!

The About Me Bag...A Character Analysis

2011-08-18T07:47:00.000-07:00

    I've been over at WriteOnCon the past few days when I've been able to. It's wonderful and kudos to the ladies that bring it to us. More kudos to those authors, agents, and editors that participate. Yay!
One thing I've heard mentioned frequently is knowing your characters. It seems obvious, and at first glance you think, "Well duh, I dreamed up these characters...of course I know them!"

    But do you??? I don't know. I thought I knew mine, but I did a little exercize with myself and found I might have some work to do. No, I KNOW I have some work to do. However, I enjoyed this exercise and I'm particularly proud because I came up with it myself. *pats back*

    So yesterday my boys went back to school (insert happy dance) and they both came home with an identical assignment. They were both titled The About Me Bag. Here is what it involves.

    Pick 3 items to put into the bag that you can present to the class. These items must tell us something about you.

This is a random google image kid, not my child! Although he is a cutie!

    So, obviously we went around finding photos of them with their brothers (I have 2 brothers), Darth Vader Lego minifigures ( I love Lego's and Star Wars), a Photo of Abe Lincoln (I love learning about history...my 8 year old is the bomb.com!) and other things that a little boy would show to represent his precious little life.
Of course one of my children asked me, "What would you put in your bag mom? A camera?"

"Hmmmmm. Probably something related to my photography, a picture of my beautiful family, and a book." I said.

They seemed pleased with this answer. All of those items fit me perfectly. I think even my husband would have chosen those three items for me. They clearly show who I am.

    Well, the writer in me started thinking about my....duh, writing. (As us writers always do) So I started to wonder what my main characters would have in their bags. Here is the scary part. I wasn't really SURE!! *GASP* How is that possible?? I could maybe pick one or two items. Maybe. But overall, I realized that I couldn't pinpoint it exactly.

    Ummmm, I think we should know our characters that well...no?! So my mission is to figure out what my characters 3 items would be in their About Me Bag. Let's take it a stop further...what will be in their About Me Bag at the END of the story?! *Insert dramatic oooooohhhh and awwwwww*

    If were writing a good story, I don't really think their About Me Bag should look the same by the end of the book, know what I mean?? Take this yet another step further. Imagine your character presenting them to the class. (This is especially easy if you write YA...if not, just pretend!) Who is watching? Are they nervous or confident? Do they not put what they really want to in their bag because they are embarssed? Is the bitchy antagonist in the back of the class making fun of them? What was in that girls bag??

    Point is, you can really work this idea to come up with a really clear picture of who your character is. I highly suggest it...or please share what you do to explore your characters!!

A Mommy Milestone

2011-08-17T08:14:00.000-07:00

This morning I took my youngest child to Kindergarten. sniff.

If you're a parent, you understand that this is a big deal. It is the start of a new way of life. All your children in school. *sigh*

He did NOT want to smile for this photo!! (I used these on my business blog...hence the markings!)

These two turkeys have been at it awhile. They're over first day photos!

Seriously Mom?!? Why are you doing that?!

He walked right into Kindergarten class and got to work on a coloring sheet. (Smart move teacher!)

I'm officially embarking on a new chapter of life. No pun intended...but I'm going to be getting more writing time, more photo editing time....more ME time. My home should stay cleaner, my meals should be better planned, my writing goals should be met. Yes?! We'll see, but I know I'm excited. When your a mother of small children this milestone seems so far off into the future. The thought of actually having a morning where you could meet a friend for coffee is a complete fantasy. But that day comes, and it's a little sad... but so exciting!!

Anyone else have kids starting school today?!

Get yo self over there!!

2011-08-16T14:35:00.000-07:00

Write On Con is on now?? Are you checking it out? You should because it's FREE!!

I need a few of these...

2011-08-12T10:58:00.000-07:00

I love crafty people. Once in a blue moon I can be crafty. It's more a lack of motivation than desire or inspiration. Many projects are on my "some day" list. I stumbled across this Etsy shop today and fell in love. I'm sharing the love with you!

Barn Owl Primitives

LOVE THIS!!!!!

21 Days.

2011-08-09T14:21:00.000-07:00

Is how long it has been since I've read a book.

*crickets chirping*

How long is it before something is a (or stops being) a habit? 28? Hmmmmm. I didn't time this right. This whole deal with myself. I'm really busy with my photography work....so it's not happening. It's like I'm going through withdrawal. No it's not 'like'. I AM going through withdrawal.

Some of you may be thinking....so what!!!??! Well, I'm a book a day girl. Seriously. No...SERIOUSLY. Maybe a book every other day max!! So this is a BIG DEAL!

Hence all the dramatic caps....I'm dying here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Searches are weird!

2011-08-02T14:48:00.000-07:00

Occasionally I look at the stats of my blog. They always make me laugh...or worry. Maybe both!

Take a look see at some search words that get people to this blog.

where oh where are my taxes
What?! Why would someone search that anyway? Who are you asking? Why did they get directed here?!

nicholas sparks blog - blogspot
What kills me about this is that I'm guessing this person is a fan of good ol Nick Sparks. Well, if you've been reading here awhile...you remember my A-Z post on his work. So...if they were a fan. They were probably a little peeved. Can't win um all.

is no other way to gauge where
huh? Gauge what?

nicole mclaughlin writing blog
Sweet. A direct hit. 7 people typed this in! Which leads me to believe this is probably my family members searching for this blog that I have not given the address too. If you're out there mother...please speak up!

nicole mclaughlin wedding
I'm guessing they were looking for me as a photographer...which makes me wonder...did I not hear from them because of my nonsense on this blog? :)

nicholas sparks rantAh ha! One person is speaking my language!

I survived...and was rewarded! :)

2011-08-01T05:58:00.000-07:00

First off, I know you are all dying to know how the party went! It was great. Crazy, but great. My son loved the cake (i'll post pics later) and all the little Jedi's passed their training. Phew. It was a crazy weekend. Thankfully my sister was here to help me get ready. Thank goodness.

So, I've now been sitting at my computer since 5:30 A.M.

Reading blogs.

Oh well.

I feel it though! I feel the words getting ready to pour out onto the keyboard. Those many words that will in fact lead up to...MY KISSING SCENE!!!! I just need to get there. I haven't read a book in....

11 DAYS!! It's almost to much to handle. I haven't gone that long without reading in almost 3 years. Seriously. Soon though, and when I do crack open a book, it will be so sweet.

In other news, super duper awesome Bryce, of Bryce Daniels Preservation Society fame gave me an award. Stop by his blog, it's a good read always!

The goal of the award is to spotlight up and coming bloggers who currently have less than 200 followers. The rules of the award are:

1. Thank the giver and link back to the blogger who gave it to you.
2. Reveal your top 5 picks and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog.
3. Copy and paste the award on your blog.
4. Have faith that your followers will spread the love to other bloggers.
5. And most of all - have bloggity-blog fun!

So, my pics are as follows:

Jacquline of My Greek Ambition. Now, I know most of you are writers...but this is not a writing blog. This is mainly a food and cooking blog, but this girl is great and she has one heck of a story. (I know you all like stories!!) Go read hers, it's adorable! Oh...and I'm sure you all like to eat, eh?

Sherry of Piquant Expressions. She writes Sci-fi and is currently talking a lot about nutrition. Plus she has 3 kids which makes me like her right away! :)

Ghenet of All About Them Words. Her blog is purdy. And she writes YA. Her blog is always a good read!

Freya of A Writer's Endeavour. She writes Childrens Fantasy....uh, awesome! Oh, and lives in the UK. Double awesome.

Alyson of Addicted to Heroines. I just found her blog and straight up LOVED the title!! :)

Phew, okay that took 2 hours...no I'm not kidding!

Happy Monday! :)

What a DAY!

2011-07-29T08:17:00.000-07:00

Today is one of those days. The kind that are wonderful and stressful at the same time. Where you have a lot to do....just so you can get to the good stuff? Know what I'm talking about?

My son is having a birthday party tomorrow. Here. In my house. Ugh. Now I know why we moms are willing to spend buukuu bucks on having the party SOMEWHERE ELSE. There is that whole cleaning thing. It sucks. On top of that, I decided to make him a cake. Double ugh. I actually used to be pretty decent at making cakes. People actually paid me. I quit for a reason. But here I am doing it again for my beloved son.

I was up last night making Lego Star Wars Mini-figures out of fondant. Seriously. It will be awesome though. So today I'm baking, cleaning, fondanting, and all the while planning to get the four of us (me and my 3 boys) ready to hit a huge water park this afternoon with my sister. Oh, and I have a shoot tomorrow morning at like 7 am....before the party at 2:00.

Yeah. Sounds good, right? I will enjoy the water park....when I get us there. The shoot will be fun, although it will be early. (Plus I love this family!) And I will enjoy the party....when it happens. But the stuff in between?? Not so much. After that party tomorrow I will throw on some "soft pants" (as we call slumming clothes) and curl up with a good book to recoup.

Oh wait. Still haven't written through the kissing scene yet.

AHHHHHHH!!! Sunday + Me = SERIOUS WRITING AND KISSING!!!

Happy Friday Peeps!! :)

Dirty Little Secrets...are hard to keep

2011-07-27T08:55:00.000-07:00

If you read yesterdays post you saw where I mentioned giving my husband back control of our finances.

Now, I'm not going to air my dirt laundry here...but we needed to button up. We've needed to do it for awhile. My husband knew this...but not to the extent he should have. I knew it too, but you see...if you are really only answering to yourself with your spending it's easy to buy a book here or there. Or decide you don't want to cook the kids lunch and head to Chick Fil-A. Those things add up, and faster than you think. When I shared with my husband the whole situation it was a relief. His words were, "Okay, but you can't spend even a penny without us discussing it."

Now, to some of you that would be a "WTF?" moment. Well, maybe at one time it would have been. But right now it is a weight off my shoulders. It is accountability. It is partnership. It's direction.

We have a plan. We are a team.

My husband doesn't realize it, but I secretly do the same thing to him with my writing. I casually voice what's going on to him. I know many of these things he really doesn't care about. But, when I voice them...I'm sharing my plan. It's not just in my head anymore...it's out there. I've said it to the universe. I do the same thing here on this blog. When you put your intentions to the world, you want to keep them. You want to work harder.

That being said, my intention was to not read another book until my two main characters kissed. I haven't read in almost a week. I'm tempted to throw a kiss in and edit it out later...but that would be lame. And weasley. No more.

Often I think my husband isn't listening when I talk about writing and kissing and blah, blah, blah. Well, last night as he was drifting off to sleep I cracked open a nutrition book. It was NON FICTION FOLKS!! That certainly doesn't count right? Well...I did feel a little guilty. About three paragraphs into protein and legumes I felt his weight shift on the bed.

"Have you written a kissing scene? Are you reading?"

"Pshhaaa, it's a diet book!"

Silence.

"Ugh."

Dirt little secrets...it's best to share.

What I know for sure....right now.

2011-07-26T11:30:00.000-07:00

Today I'm channeling my inner Oprah. I need to do that sometimes. Don't you?

A few things I know for sure today.

Giving my husband back the job of handling the bill paying and finances has been the best decision I've made in the last 5 years. Really.

I'm desperately ready for school to start.

The last two days I've watched more TV than I have in the last year.

I made a deal with myself that I couldn't read another book until the two main characters in my ms have their first kiss. I haven't read anything since last Thursday!!! OMG!! (Hence the tv watching.)

I haven't been able to write because I've had so much picture editing to do. Ugh!!

My little puppy is almost one. He is still a brat! We love him anyway.

I'm feeling rather optimistic about everything lately. It's a good feeling.

The heat here in the Midwest is getting OLD!!

Having my work email give me issues has become a real problem. When you aren't getting your emails, you are just SURE that the ones you're missing are very important. I'm sure I'm missing a local celebrity asking me to shoot their wedding. I'm sure of it!

My wip has suddenly developed a new piece to it's puzzle that I'm very excited about. Don't you love it when your characters reveal a part of themselves to you that you didn't see coming?? Now....if I could just get some time to write!

Happy Tuesday to you!

Yee hawwwww....the words are flowing!

2011-07-22T06:18:00.000-07:00

I'm in the groove lovelies! I think I ran the first/present bug outta town. (maybe) I'm feeling the motivation to get this thing DONE!!!! I want to type THE END so bad it physically hurts. I don't care if it ends with a 6 week rewrite. I just want to get there!! Oh, and I wanted to share that picture of my baby!

Happy Friday!

Can't find the rhythm.

2011-07-21T14:58:00.000-07:00

My brain has a little problem. It goes like this.

I read a book in first person present...and then when I go back to my novel words don't sound right anymore! I get confused, things don't make sense. Wording seems awkward.

I just finished up the novel Anna and the French Kiss...which I LOVED! Don't get me wrong, it's not Anna's fault. But all I can hear is 1st/present. The end.

Does anyone else have this problem???? How can I switch my brain back?

Sometimes you have to Steal!

2011-07-19T05:39:00.000-07:00

That was a hook of a title...no? Sorry, I didn't mean it. I should have put borrow. But that didn't have the same zest at 7:00 AM on a Tuesday morning where it's already 83*.

Speaking of the heat, it's HOT. Like, hope my AC does freeze up hot!

Summer does not equal creative process for me. At. All. I have to literally suck the words from my over-processed brain. It's tough. Very tough. Anyone else have this problem? It may be the heat. It may be the kids. It may be the desire to do other things...go to the pool, vacation, nothing.

Anyway, two of my favorite bloggers recently had excellent post that inspired me. I thought they might inspire you too. Hence the stealing/not stealing. I'm actually referring you. You should get to know these gals if you haven't already, because they are the shiz!! (Sorry, too much iCarly as of late.)

Heidi Willis of Some Mad Hope did a great post on Motivation. Loved it. There is no story without motivation, and she gives you some things to think about. (We're talking your characters motivation here...not your own!!) Plus, she is currently getting her MFA, so she might sorta know what she is talking about!!! ;) I love reading her posts every time!

Natasha Hanova of Writes By Moonlight has a post on being stuck. I can relate to this and she has an excellent set of questions to ask yourself about your "stuck scene" that I love. Sometimes you just need a little something to get the wheels turning again. Check her blog out, she always has good stuff. Oh, and I've read her writing so I KNOW she knows her stuff!! :)

I've mentioned this blog before, but it deserves another mention. Stephanie Morrill's blog Go Teen Writers. Don't be discouraged by the name adults, there is some seriously awesome content on this blog. And Stephanie will welcome you even if you are 45. She is just like that. I love what she is doing for young writers though. Giving them a place to share and learn. She holds contests that encourage their creativity and sharing and I think that is so awesome. If I would have had access to Stephanie fifteen year ago it would have been a game changer! She has done a whole series on writing a novel and it is great. Locate the info by the tabs at the top of her blog. Good stuff peeps. Oh, and check out Stephanie's awesome series here. I've read it and LOVED it.

Sometimes you just need something to light the fire...I know you can find something with these ladies!!

Happy Tuesday!

Dreaming Big

2011-07-18T10:38:00.000-07:00

There is something magical about hearing that another writer has been signed or gotten an agent excited! I feel it in my gut. It's similar to that feeling you feel when your going down a roller coaster. A little light headedness. A little drop. Even though it's not YOU, you're hearing about. (damn) It's someone...and that means what?

It's possible. It can happen, and it can happen to you.

I love hearing these stories, because more than likely...that person really deserves it. No one else knows how hard writing is than another writer. It's not for the faint of heart. It's hard, grueling, cry inducing work. (Okay, for me it is anyway!) After I hear these stories I imagine my own. I can't help it—you know you do it too!! You have too. The only way to keep going is to maintain the dream.

So here we go. Close your eyes. Dream it. Share it with me. These dreams will motivate us all!

Historical Fiction....SIGH

2011-07-15T07:19:00.000-07:00

I just can't get enough of it. My love of history is extensive. My love of reading....ridiculous. Put them together?

BLISS!

Oh, and throw in a strong romantic element?? HEAVENLY BLISS!

So, last week being what it was, (see post below) I needed an escape this past weekend. In a bad way. An escape is really what all my reading is. I think that is why I have to read books that end happily. They may not be happy throughout, that's okay. But they must end feeling good. I'm escaping my stressful life for goodness sakes. I want some hope in there...some kissing too if we're being honest.

Last weekends escape was The Yellow House: A Novel, by Patricia Falvey. It was perfect. A strong voice in the protagonist and yummy secondary characters. The icing of course was the historical setting, which was Northern Ireland in the 19teens and 1920's. If you know anything about Irish or English history at that time you know it was an extremely tumultuous period. Home Rule, Easter Rising, Catholic, Protestant, Quaker, and of course WWI. It covers all of that time thru the eyes of a young Catholic girl coming of age and trying to keep her family together through it all.

What I appreciated about Patricia Falvey's style was that it was smooth and easy. Sometimes with these historical fiction books you're in for a grueling roller coaster of emotions and drama. While there was no lack of drama or intensity...it wasn't heavy. It was perfect for summer and gave me my historical fix with the perfect romantic story woven in. I loved it. I escaped perfectly...and I thank her for that!

A Beautiful Life

2011-07-14T10:14:00.000-07:00

How is everyone doing? I notice I'm not the only blogger that has let summer and life get in the way. Is the summer being good to everyone's wip? Not mine, which is also shameful. My motivation comes and goes. It's hard to feel motivation for anything while the midwest is experiencing this epic heat wave.

Then on the 4th, a little girl we know was tragically killed by a stray bullet. I am friends with her mother and her aunt. It has been absolutely heartbreaking. The shock and randomness of it has been numbing. I had photographed this little girl and spent time last Friday prepping the images to send to her stepmother for her funeral slideshow. It was the saddest thing. To open each file and look into her beautiful smiling face was so hard. A smiling face full of so much possibility for the future.

The funeral was beautiful and overwhelming. Watching a mother grieve the death of her child is a heartbreak in itself. Watching a father grieve his daughter is almost too much to bare. I think I felt that way because watching a mother grieve makes me imagine losing my own child...but watching the father grieve makes me imagine my husband hurting and that is even worse.

I don't mean to be a downer today, on this beautiful (albeit hot) summer day. But this is where I've been. It is though, a reminder of life's fragility. A reminder to make sure our children feel and know our love for them every single day because anything can happen.

The beauties of Blair's life are endless, but her final gift was the donation of six of her organs. It was her choice. She had voiced it to her father a couple of weeks before her unexpected death after finding his drivers license in his wallet and inquiring what it meant. Isn't that a beautiful thing? Just thinking of it brings tears.

A little away time.

2011-06-23T12:37:00.000-07:00

I love doing things on impulse. Love it. I may sometimes end up regretting it, but not often. I love the rush. The feeling that one minute things are mundane and in a flash they became exciting.

That happened yesterday after a friend posted the Southwest Airlines deals on Facebook. My husband was working from home (while laying in bed with his laptop) and I got on their website and looked at the map.

Five minutes later and a little discussion and we had booked a quick flight to Washington DC for our 10 year anniversary in September.

Now, I know DC doesn't scream romance and celebration...but we have both wanted to go for awhile. We both love art and history, so the Smithsonian has been calling for a few years, plus neither of us have ever been. Bonus??? Everything in DC is nearly free. Well, not hotel or food. But we can be entertained for free.

I'm so excited. We so RARELY get time alone together, I will just be happy to stroll along and do whatever we wish with no one screaming, "he's hitting me!!!!!!!!!!!" That will be bliss.

If you've been to DC, please share. Sights, restaurants. Things to avoid...seriously!!

I'm it!

2011-06-22T08:04:00.000-07:00

My wonderful writing pal Natasha over at Writes By Moonlight tagged me with a meme the other day and I'm finally getting around to it! I actually enjoy meme's. I'm weird like that.

If you could go back in time and relive one moment, what would it be?
Any moment with my Dad. He passed away when I was 10 from a brain tumor. I remember a lot of him, but not as much as I would like. I was home schooled for a while and he taught me science, history and math. I would love to relive any of those moments of him teaching me. He was so smart.

If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?

This is a tough one. There are plenty to choose from, but once you think about it and get technical....it could change so many other things after it that I wouldn't want changed. I would probably have tried harder in high school and college. I took education for granted....always wanting to be in the next place in life. I never appreciated how EASY it really was. Oh well.

What movie/tv character do you most resemble in personality?
No. Clue. I just spent an hour trying to figure out an answer to this...so I'm moving on. Hmm.

If you could push one person off a cliff and get away with it, who would it be?
Wow, someone came to mind immediately. Although murder is a strong reaction, but I really would like this person to go away. I don't want to upset anyone and I don't usually "go there" but her initials are S.P. If you guess, more power to you.

Name one habit you want to change in yourself.

I wish I could be more consistent about working out and being healthy.

Describe yourself in one word.

Stubborn. -That came from my husband. Ouch.

Describe the person who named you in this meme in one word.

Inspiring.

Why do you blog? Answer in one sentence.
It's enjoyable, and I love to interact with other writers.

Who am I tagging?
The last 3 commenters on my blog....gotcha!!! :)

Dana @ A Squirrel Amongst Lions

Bryce @ The Bryce Daniels Preservation Society

Tara @ Tara Tyler Talks

Love and Movies

2011-06-20T08:15:00.000-07:00

I love, love. I love it in books, I love it in real life, I love my job because of it. Shooting weddings and families makes me happy.

When I read a book, I must have it in some way. I can't easily do a pure mystery or thriller. I can, and I have, but I'm not naturally drawn to it. Therefore, I don't write without it. I don't know if I could. Sometimes I consider trying to write (just as an excercize for myself)a purely horror short story or something. Just to test myself and strengthen my skills. I do that with my photography sometimes. I shoot something in a completely new way just to see if I can, and then to see if it helps me in my "normal" work. It usually does.

Does anyone ever try this? Write something that feels foreign to you? Obviously we were forced to do that in school...but that was a LONG time ago. I remember times in school when I would hear the assignment and groan only to find that I was actually pretty good at whatever was assigned.

That's my tip this week (hmmmm, I don't usually give tips) I'm going to write a couple of pages of something completely out of my comfort zone. It will have to be thriller or mystery. I encourage you to do the same. Let me know how it goes for you!! I'd even love for you to post and link it.

Also...has anyone seen the movie Midnight in Paris? If you are a writer, you will get a kick out of it. I wouldn't call myself a Woody Allen fan, but I adored this movie. Check it out!

Do you write YA?

2011-06-17T13:10:00.000-07:00

Do you need some inspiration?

Do you want to see and hear and watch how teens act and speak?

Get yourself to the nearest aquatic center STAT! Material ABOUNDS! It is very interesting!

Till next time....

I need another A-Z

2011-06-06T12:19:00.000-07:00

That challenge really had me on a roll with blogging. It was good to have something that made me more accountable and actually have something to blog about. Even if it was totally random.

The good thing is that writing has been happening. Yay! I think it's because the weather in Kansas right now plunks right into the setting for my wip. I find that really puts me in the mood. Makes it real.

Do you find it hard to write about a place or season that you aren't currently experiencing? I think I could write about the beach in winter if I had too...but it would certainly be more enjoyable to write about the beach while at the beach. No?

I'm glad nobody protested violently to the fact that I'm not currently writing a YA. But it sure is a whole other ball game writing adult. I think I like it!

Summer = Exhaustion

2011-05-31T06:14:00.000-07:00

I love Summer, but it is so tiring.

The weekends are long and exhausting if I'm shooting a wedding. A wedding day is high adrenaline then a major crash at the end. This weekends wedding included 8 hours of driving, 11 hours of shooting, lots of stress, and seriously sore muscles. There is just no way to get used to standing and squatting for a full day. No matter what, it is draining. Emotionally and physically. So, I spend all of Sunday recovering. Sometimes Monday too.

Then, during the week I have my precious boys to contend with. Weddings start to seem more and more enjoyable!! haha! Just kidding, I love my boys. But the novelty of summer will start to wear off here in about a week and the complaining, whining, hitting and yelling will come full force.

Somewhere in this madness I will be finishing my wip. OH YES, i will. I must remember? I said, must be done by the end of summer!

The beautiful thing about being a wedding photograher and a writer is being able to witness so many different relationships. The dynamic of a wedding day leads to the most AMAZING interactions between friends and family members. Good, bad, stressful, precious, emotional. It is the most awesome research...and I'm paid to observe, witness and capture this. All the while I'm soaking it in like a sponge for material. Really. I love that. AND this weekends wedding was practically set in my stories small town. It was a beautiful thing.

Now, I must force myself to plant my rear in my chair...open up word, and get to work!!!! My boys are putting together a humongo lego set so we'll see how long that keeps them busy. If it works I may be investing some serious money in legos this summer!

Guilty Pleasure

2011-05-27T07:07:00.000-07:00

It's Friday. I'm going out of town. I don't have a lot of time. I have recently rediscovered a guilty pleasure of mine....ready to laugh?

Hall and Oates.

Seriously.

Unless you were broken up while one of their songs were playing, I don't know how you can't feel happy while listening to Maneater, I Can't Go For That, She's Gone, or Rich Girl.

I leave you with a happy Friday morning. I DARE you not to sing along!

Snippets of Information

2011-05-24T17:47:00.000-07:00

* I wrote 2000 words today. Yes I did. I'm slightly proud of it. It was the good of kind of writing too, the kind that just flows and before you know it your plot has taken on a new dimension you hadn't seen coming. I truly believe it's those days that help us to slog thru the rest. Hear, hear?

* Having my nails painted makes me feel so much prettier and feminine. Seriously. Am I alone?

* The only way I can enjoy the presence of my puppy is for him to have a bone to chew on. The end.

* Muddy backyard + puppy + hysterical woman + carpet = disaster.

* I'm out of bones.

* Sometimes when you run your own business, you should wait for a clients check to clear before paying your own bills. (grrrrrrrrr)

* My children have 2 more days of school. I'm terrified and excited at the same time.

* My heart breaks for the people in Joplin and Reading.

* More storms are on the way. I will sleep with my hard drive. I have peoples weddings on there!!!!

* I'm going out of town with another photographer friend this weekend to a small town in western Kansas to shoot a wedding. I'll be gone all day Friday, Saturday and be back Sunday.

* Yes, western Kansas is exactly what you would imagine. Remote...but the people are so darn friendly and when your children are not around and you have a friend to laugh with—it's as good as paradise.

* My wip is not a YA. Can you forgive me? Should I change my header?

Warning: I'm about to GUSH!

2011-05-24T05:53:00.000-07:00

gush

intransitive verb

1: to issue copiously or violently

2: to emit a sudden copious flow

3: to make an effusive display of affection or enthusiasm <an aunt gushing over the baby>

I just read the. best. book.

Seriously. Sometimes you read and book and after wards you feel compelled. compelled to do what? I don't know. Just compelled. To Google history, to tell your friends, to hug your children, work on your wip.

This book compelled me.

The Winter Rose by Jennifer Donnelly.

It was sooooo good. It falls into the genre I've heard described as "historical fiction with a strong romantic element". AKA as The perfect genre for me.

In my world, it doesn't get any better than this. Drama, despair, happiness, love, excitement....but with the perfect ending. Jennifer Donnelly plotting is spot on. I was fully engaged the whole entire time. I'll admit, the overall story line is somewhat formulaic for a romance, but it is the formula I love best. Opposites attract, fall in love, drama ensues, mistakes a re made, misunderstanding, separation, pain, suffering, finding out the truth....blah, blah, blah. I won't give it ALL to you.

Along side this 'old as time' formula is the most amazing details. The setting is turn of the century London. Need I say more? A woman from a wealthy upbringing wanting to do good crossing paths with the biggest "gang leader" of lower class London. You had me there. Done.

It's not a short novel...and I read it in about 24 hours. Yes, yes I did. I'm not ashamed. My kids DID have clean clothes to wear to school today.

This book is part of a trilogy, the first one titled The Tea Rose. I haven't read it. I should have, because it sounds amazing. The third, The Wild Rose comes out in August and i will be at the book store on release day. BELIEVE ME! I can't wait.

Jennifer also released a historical YA novel last year that looks really good also. Revolution.

Get on with things alredy.

2011-05-20T09:10:00.000-07:00

Four more days of school for my kids. FOUR!

I have mixed feelings on this. Part of me is thrilled to let go of the morning routine. (Although I will still get up at 6:45 and make my husband luch, coffee, and a water bottle. It's what I do!) But nothing beats letting my kids sleep in. The other part of me is dreading the summer boredom. Fighting, whining, hitting etc. It becomes skull splitting.

Thank heaven's for pool passes. Seriously. It must seriously be a lifesaver if I am willing to put on a swimming suit in front of every person in my small town.

Either way, I'm ready to get on with it. The last couple weeks of school I'm just done. DONE! Ready to figure out our new normal for the summer. When your kids are still young every summer is a little bit different than the last.

I'm really hoping to get my husband out the door and then spend the quite morning time writing. (Remember that whole finishing before the end of summer thing I threw out there!! yikes!)

Completely unrelated...I've been working out the last couple of weeks. I'm talking lunges and squats. It's hurting. It's working. I'm seeing the difference. It's kind of awesome. We'll see how this plays out!

Happy very rainy Friday! I just want to crawl in bed and read with the thunder as my backdrop.

What does a rainy day make you want to do??

Way Too Long

2011-05-17T06:01:00.000-07:00

I apologize. I seemed to have taken a blogging hiatus. Sabbatical. Vacation. Break.

I think I'm past it. Maybe.

It's just May. May is busy!! I'm busy with work. Seniors are needing stuff for the end of year, moms want photos of their kiddo's in the flowers, etc. Busy with school stuff. Every activity is having a "end of year" get together. Cub scouts, preschool, talent show, music program.

The main thing though? BASEBALL. Baseball is in full swing. (hardy har) Because of that, we are on the go like crazy. With three little boys in ball this year, we are living and breathing it. 4 games a week, practice. It doesn't stop. The schedule is insane. I told my husband...the first boy that shows the sign of "not really being into it." is OUT! I'm not putting myself through this for some kid that isn't into it! Got me?

I know that sounds mean, but really? So far, all three boys are doing well. And truthfully, I wouldn't let them quit easily. Two of them are still a little too young to know if they really don't like it. They haven't got to the good stuff yet. I happen to like baseball, so it's really the only sport I will go through this crazy schedule for. I enjoy the ball fields in summer. Especially in a small town like ours. It's the epitome of summer to hear the crack of the bat on a warm evening. Kids running around in the background. People you know surrounding you. My kids begging for nachos from the concession stand. I love it. Would I get three boys up at 5 am for a day full of freezing soccer games in October? NOT A CHANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, all of this is to say...Sorry. I've neglected this blog and I'm ready to get back on the ball.

My WIP is also in a happy place. I've been writing daily and I told my writing group girls that it must be completed by the end of summer. MUST. It can't go on after that. I won't let it. Hold me to it.

Speaking of my very talented writing ladies, they are back from OWFI and had awesome connections with agents that I'm praying turn into something amazing. I'm so proud of all of them and so very honored that I have them to share my writing process with.

Full

2011-05-07T18:25:00.000-07:00

It's been a full, exhausting day. You know, the kind where you've worked hard and you fall in to bed feeling accomplished.

That's my day today. A friend and I had a garage sale the last two days and had lots of fun hanging out and making money. Today my husband and I cut down an ornamental tree gone wrong in our yard and did some relandscaping, complete with a $150 Home Depot trip. I planted cilantro, tarragon, sweet basil, and tomatoes. Got a sunburn, pulled some muscles and finished the evening off at a Sonic Car Show. (my husband is into muscle cars!) To top it off it was a beautiful, hot sunny day.

I love days like that. It is going to end with a hot shower and reading in bed next to my husband. Perfect!

Happy Mothers Day to all you mommy's out there!!

To Compare or not Compare....

2011-05-04T06:25:00.000-07:00

We ALL do it. It's human nature. Is it healthy? My answer would be yes and no.

It's healthy in the sense that you have to compare to grow. There is no other way to gauge where you've been, where you are, and where you need to go without comparing your work in some way.

On the flip side, it can become a problem if you're not very careful. It can lead to severe frustration, dispair, or even arrogance. Is that a problem? Uhhh, if you're not really that good than yeah! It is a problem. What you might really need is a fat helping of humble pie. A little frustration isn't necessarily a bad thing though, it can motivate.

Last night I went to my writing group. There are 5 of us. I'm the greenest of the group. :) I'm cool with that. It is what it is. They are gearing up for a writing conference this weekend. I'm so very excited for them...I'm hoping something amazing happens for at least one of them. I'm hoping that the proverbial ball will start rolling. At the same time, it made me sad. I'm no where near pitching my wip. No. Where. I guess theoretically I could just go for fun and learning, but I'm not made of money, and I've got those three kids that need me...so until I'm a little closer to that place I'm going to wait.

As I sat there helping them prepare pitches, polish synopses and plan the hotel sleeping arrangements, I could have felt sorry for myself. Sorry that I'm not further along. I could have felt that I'm not good enough. But the whole situation was just a huge motivator. I'm channeling that envy into hard work, it's the only thing that makes sense! I'm thinking about all the hard work they've been doing for years to get themselves to this point and understanding that I need to plant my butt in front of this laptop every stinkin day so I can go next year!!

I think any creative endeavor...or anything at all for that matter requires a little comparison. After all, isn't that what were REALLY doing when we blog hop? We click onto a blog, and what were really looking for is ourselves!

Is she a mother too? She writes while nursing?
Oh, his wip is only half way done?
Oh good, she has trouble with grammar also.
She writes paranormal YA also!
He is now published after receiving 65 rejections...phew!

We are looking to compare. Looking for confirmation. We want to have that Jim Carey Dumb and Dumber moment....."So you're telling me there's a chance!"

We need to be constantly reminded that our dreams are possible. That we're on the right track. Our frustration and hard work may not be in vain.

Of course sometimes we just want to say, "ugh...bitch!" And you know what? As long as we keep it too ourselves, that's okay too. We are human after all.

The need to Read

2011-05-03T07:23:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I started reading Stephen Kings book titled On Writing. (thank you Dawn!)

Wow. I fell in love with him, which is funny because in my life he has represented fear! I remember being about 9 and seeing Cujo on televsion one evening with my mother. I have been scarred ever since. (I also loved it!)

In 6th grade all the boys I knew were reading The Stand. Their arms would bow out beside them grasping their Trapper Keeper, science book, and the hugest book I'd ever seen. I couldn't fathom any 6th grader (except me, ha!) reading a book that big. When my brain made the connection that the author of that massive book was the same mastermind behind Cujo I began having graphic fantasies about what those boys were reading. I remember watching one boy in particular one day. he had finished his assignment and pulled open his monster novel. I watched him closely — just sure that he must be terrified. Sure that he must be reading of blood and gore and very scary things. I was waiting for him to shut the book in terror....unable to continue. It didn't happen.

Want to know a secret? To this day I have no clue what The Stand is about. I'm assuming it's a good book.

So, back to me reading On Writing. Last night I read one part that really resonated with me. He talked about the importance of reading. He stressed his theory that NO ONE can be a good writer without reading. I already agreed with this totally. It just makes sense to me. But I've often questioned my desires to write throughout my life. I even did it through the beginning of this book. Stephen talked about writing all through his adolescent years, his early adult years. Submitting, writing, submitting, rejection....blah, blah, blah.

We've heard this story before. Famous writer wanted it all their life...so they DESERVED to be published. They were better. They wanted it MORE. (That's what we're thinking right???)

Did he want it more than I do? Well, in many ways yes.

I learned to read when I was three. Not because I was a child prodigy, but because my mother devoted herself to it. I remember living and breathing flash cards and repition. I loved it. I was good. I slept with my books, I organized my books. I LOVED my books. Reading was my life. I wanted to write early. I knew that I would be a writer. It was that simple.

I was always thinking of story ideas. I was always writing down little stories and creating characters. All the while I read like an addict.

My desire to write had a long draught. It didn't dry up completely...but it was sparse. In those years I went to high school, worked, met my husband, had babies, stayed up all night with said babies, stressed, made snacks. Does this story sound familiar? To some of you it will. Here is the deal, during those years....I wasn't really reading. Sure I read the basics for school...The Scarlet Letter, Red Badge of Courage, Killing Mr. Griffin. While my boys were young I read the Harry Potter books as they came out. I loved them too...but I wasn't really reading for pleasure on my own all the time. Consistently.

About three years ago, when my youngest son was three, I started reading again. Like a maniac. It was a problem, I was taking in books like I was starving. I had been. My husband was all, "What is with all this reading, the laundry hasn't been done in 2 weeks!" I wanted to tell him, "This is who I've always been!!" I'd just been dormant. (As young mothers often are.) The writing desire came back almost immediately.

IMMEDIATELY.

Funny enough, when I finally told my husband after a while that I was kinda sorta writing something. He wasn't at all surprised. It seems I had been a reader all along...I just didn't allow myself the indulgence. Life had gotten in the way.

Last night I read this in Stephen Kings On Writing.

Can I be blunt on this subject? If you don't have time to read, you don't have the time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that.

Thoughts? I'll tell you what I thought. Stephen King was giving me permission to stop beating myself up over the fact that for years writing wasn't a priority. It didn't mean that I wanted it less, or was any less capable of being a writer. I just wasn't in the right frame of mind. I wasn't reading.

Why, as creative minds, are we always judging ourselves against others? It is a disease! More on that tomorrow.

Able to breathe....

2011-05-02T07:15:00.000-07:00

What a weekend right? Well, beyond the news...it was a big one for me.

Saturday night I had a surprise 40th birthday party for my husband. OH THE STRESS!! This past month I have been a wreck preparing for it. I'm so glad it's over!! Not because it wasn't fun, it really was. But because it was very stressful keeping it from my husband!! AND, he is not a surprise party kind of guy. I was prepared for him to hate me for a minute when we walked in.

If you've ever held a surprise party you know about the paranoia. The whole week before I was just SURE he was onto me. I knew he was picking up clues, that he was looking for them.

He wasn't. He was shocked and horrified at the same time. :) It was a beautiful thing. As we walked into the game room at a local "pubish" restaurant and 15 people yelled surprise (at which was supposed to be a couples shower for one of his closest friends- I even sent us an invite in the mail!!) he jumped in surprise.

I instantly turned and hugged him, laughing in his ear. "Do you hate me?"

"A little bit," He said with a chuckle. It was a great night!

A-Z Challange X-TREMELY RARE

2011-04-28T08:03:00.000-07:00

Today I mowed my lawn. *pause for dramatic effect.* I have never done that before.

I wanted to do something for my husband.

I wanted to be outside because it's beautiful.

I wanted to feel active.

The weeds were tall.

You know what? I really enjoyed it...except for the forming blisters on my palms from starting the damn thing. Who knew that was so hard?? (By the way the top of my mower says "easy-start". Pshawww. right!)

But it was sort of relaxing and I spent the whole time thinking of my wip...which is my favorite past-time. Is writing my wip my fav past-time? No. Thinking about it is. Can anyone else relate to that?

The first thing I did after was run in and skype my husband to brag and say "AREN'T YOU PROUD OF ME??" He was. :)

Happy Thursday. Hope it's a beautiful day where you live.

A-Z Challange WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME- and some REVIEWS

2011-04-27T06:34:00.000-07:00

For some reason the last week or so of this A-Z challenge has been, well, a challenge! Really. I flew right along at first, now I'm struggling. Not really to come up with anything, but just to make myself do it. Hmmmm. That seems to be a recurring theme in my existence.

So, anyway, I've been reading a lot of first person woman's fiction. Some more literary...some even a little chick littish....sorry. But recall, I've confessed to being a romance junkie so you really shouldn't be surprised.

Without further ado....here is what I've been reading.

Bloodroot by Amy Greene

Named for a flower whose blood-red sap possesses the power both to heal and poison, Bloodroot is a stunning fiction debut about the legacies—of magic and madness, faith and secrets, passion and loss—that haunt one family across the generations, from the Great Depression to today.

I LOVED this book. The voice was amazing, and by 6 different narrators no less. This was fascinating, and she did it so well. The imagery she created was so real I could feel and hear it. This story was intense and haunting and I loved the way it all related. It made me think of my own past and how connected we are to our heritage by ways we can probably never appreciate. This kind of book is right up my alley, and it's getting really good reviews. Check it out!!!

Mistress of Rome by Kate Quinn

First-century Rome: A world of depravity, blood, and secrets. The ruthless and enigmatic Emperor Domitian watches over all, fearing assassination from every direction . . . but not from the woman who fascinates him most.

Passionate, musical, and guarded, Thea is a slave girl from Judaea. Purchased as a toy for the spiteful heiress Lepida Pollia, Thea becomes her mistress's rival for the love of Arius the Barbarian, Rome's newest and most savage gladiator. His love brings Thea the first happiness of her life - but their affair ends quickly when a jealous Lepida tears them apart.

Oh my gosh!!! I just finished this book last night at midnight....I'm in love with Kate Quinn. I want to be her. I LOVE HISTORICAL BOOKS! I love them. If a book has me getting up and google searching it's facts, I'm all good. If the author is spot on...I'm in heaven. Of course she took some liberties, she admits that...but it's a fiction book. BUT, Emperor Domitian is real and she did him so well!! Thea and Arius The Barbarian....I was in love. They were fictional but you could believe every word of it. I loved the scenes of the Gladiator games. So graphic and realistic. She didn't hold back and you could imagine every second of it. This world was brutal, in fact if you're easily offended it might not be your cup of tea. It's very honest in the telling of what life would have been like for a slave or child in this time period. I love reading about things like this, reminding us of where humanity has been. Relating it to where we are now. I'm in awe of Kate Quinn...she is good, people. Real good.

I can't speak for anyone else, but for me, this book could not go wrong. (Well, yes it could...but it didn't, phew!!) Love, passion, emperor's, Rome, Colosseum, Traitors, Fighting, GLADIATORS!! Yes, you need to read it.

The Provence Cure for the Broken Hearted by Bridget Asher

Brokenhearted and still mourning the loss of her husband, Heidi travels with Abbot, her obsessive-compulsive seven-year-old son, and Charlotte, her jaded sixteen-year-old niece, to the small village of Puyloubier in the south of the France, where a crumbling stone house may be responsible for a mending hearts since before World War II. There, Charlotte confesses a shocking secret, and Heidi learns the truth about her mother's "lost summer". As three generations collide with one another, with the the neighbor who knows it all, an enigmatic Frenchman, Heidi, Charlotte, and Abbot journey through love, loss, and laughter amid the vineyards, and delicious food of Provence. Can the magic of the house heal them all?

The cover of this book pulled me in immediately. Traveling is my dream. The idea of a mother having a "lost summer" spoke to me immediately. As did the idea that a mother and child were alone after the loss of their father. I've been there. I've written previously on this blog of the need to escape after that loss. So, this book was an easy buy for me. Once I started reading I was a little concerned. Something about this book wasn't pulling me in right off the bat. It was a little too witty. I'm not really sure what I mean by that...but it reminded me of a Gilmore Girls episode. For the record, I hated Gilmore Girls. The whole witty banter was so over the top It made me cringe. This wasn't THAT bad...but it was giving me that vibe.

Thank goodness I didn't cave right then and there. I ended up really enjoying this book. It was a feel good book. With that being said, she described some very real, very spot on emotions of pain and suffering. I could get a good feel for Heidi's grieving. I'm not sure if it's because I imagined my mother or she just made it very believable. I'm thinking both. Once they got on the plane to France, I was all in. Captivated. I loved the relationships, and I loved the imagery. Who couldn't picture themselves living in a little home on the side of a mountain in France surrounded by vineyards? Seriously! This is a perfect summer read. You'll want to get out your passport!

FYI, Bridget Asher, Juliana Baggot, and NE Bode are all this same woman! :) You're children might have read her Nobodies books. This woman writes a lot! Cheers to her!!

Has anyone read any of these books...or read something good lately???

A-Z Challange UNPLUG

2011-04-25T12:16:00.000-07:00

I know this is late in the day...but better late then never, right?

I need to unplug. From the internet. Shut it down. Turn it off. Walk away. Log off.

My wip is talking to me and I need to stop telling it to buzz off. It needs some attention...so here we go.

Later!

(Only till tomorrow...how much will power do you think I have?)

A-Z Challange TIME OFF FOR FAMILY

2011-04-23T09:15:00.000-07:00

I know, I already skipped a day this week...but whatcha gonna do?

Photo shoot today of a sweet family
Coloring Eggs
Rice Krispy Treat Eggs (have you seen this commercial?)
Filling Baskets
Making sure groceries for tomorrow are suffecient.

Lots to do...hope you all have a Happy Easter tomorrow!! :)

A-Z Challange SKIPPED R - Shyness - Special Day

2011-04-22T05:52:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was incredibly busy! I had an early morning shoot and then my youngest son had an Easter Tea at Preschool. (Then grocery shopping, community dinner...blah,blah,blah.)

But back to that Easter Tea. My youngest son is 5 and VERY shy, and self conscious. He doesn't even like to joke around too much because he gets so embarrassed. (I joke with him anyway, because he laughs and smiles before he gets angry....and he has 2 big brothers and I think he better toughen up now!)

Anyway, part of the Easter Tea was the cute little classes getting up and singing a few Easter/Spring Songs. My son had been worrying on this for days. I finally told him, "You don't have to sing, but you do have to just get up there with your class."

My thought was that once he was up there, he would be fine!

WRONG. He was stone cold silent up there. Not a hand movement, not a clap. Not a smile. In fact, his signature look in these situations is to suck his cheeks in so he doesn't smile. Because he WANTS to like it. I know he does. He's just too embarrassed to show that he likes it.

Sadly, I sort of remember being like this as a child. I didn't want to draw attention to myself AT. ALL.

Well, luckily those preschool things only last a second, so he came down to have snacks with me and all was good after he got a cheese stick and grapes. I guess the only bright side to this shyness is that he keeps him my baby a little bit longer. :)

In unrelated news, my husband is off today for Good Friday! How awesome is that? I'll take it. I'm going to take a day off from editing and just chill out at home.
It's storming out, I may make cookies. How great does that sound???

A-Z Challange Q is hard.

2011-04-20T06:16:00.000-07:00

I had a heck of a time with this letter...nothing that came to mind inspired me. So, I share this video. I love these shows!!

A-Z Challange PHOTOGRAPHY TIPS

2011-04-19T06:21:00.000-07:00

I love to write and would love to write daily, but I also have another job. A job I actually get paid for...so my husband appreciates when I devote a little time to it. Okay, most of my time to it. This job is photographing people.

So, since I know a couple of things about taking photos...I thought I'd share a few tips. These are things you can do to improve your photos even while shooting on a full auto mode. You'll be amazed what a difference it will make.

1. Ignore the background...Look at the Light!

This is the biggest! You know you've done it, there is a beautiful background...maybe full of blooming tulips. You position your kiddo's right in front of it. Maybe it will look great. But what if it's 1 PM, and the sun is high. Ya think?? If you were shooting on manual...I could tell you how to make this work better. But let's do this the easy way...take your subjects out of the sun and put them in the shade.

The best kind of shade is where some light is getting in to pick up some catch lights in their eyes. But look at your subjects face. Are they squinting? Are there shadows all over their face? Not Good!! Find some nice even shaded light and snap away. Even if the background isn't ideal...your images will be so much better! Promise.

The image below I put them in the shade that this building created, and the light was even and flattering.

*If you must take it in front of something, like your on vaca and want your subject in front of a particular landmark etc...and the sun is high and unflattering, try using your flash to fill your subjects face.

2. Fill the Frame

Especially if getting in the right light causes you to have an unflattering background. Is the perfect light in front of a trash dump? It could be cool...but maybe not. So fill your frame with your subject.

3. Rule of Thirds

If you've ever taken an art class, you will have heard this term. It is a compositionall rule that applies to all mediums of art— Photograpy, painting, drawing. It is more pleasing to the eye and it can make a good image great. It involves breaking the scene into 9 equal parts and positioning your subject where lines intersect. So, there are 4 sections you can use. This isn't rocket science...it doesn't have to be exact!! (See the chart below.) But look at the 3 examples...if they would have been centered they wouldn't be as good. This rule also is in place to try to avoid the horizon being in the center of an image. It needs to be in the upper part or the lower part. Never in the center.

If you start looking for it, you will find the rules of thirds everywhere. Advertisements, movies, tv, photography.

With technology these days, there is no excuse for not getting the best picture possible...you can try and try again. I'd love to hear if these helped anyone...I hope so!!

A-Z Challange ORGANIZATION

2011-04-18T06:19:00.000-07:00

Not one of my strong points.

Actually, and my husband says this all the time, I am the QUEEN of planning, strategizing, and getting organized. It's the follow thru that gets me every stinkin time.

I come up with the most amazing solutions. Why can't I follow them? I've made myself so many "schedules" over the years.

I will say though, that I still do love a few things. I may fall off the wagon...often, but I come back to these and I think they are worth sharing.

1. Motivated Moms I love these things and I buy the new one every year. This is a chore organizational system that you purchase and then print out weekly, or daily depending on your preference. The idea is that you just do what is on the list everyday and it will cover all areas of your home keeping it perfect and clean! Each day is not hard, and there are certain things you do everyday. This is great for people like me that like to see a list and CHECK IT OFF! I also like the idea that someone has already figured out how often things need to be done and they just tell me when to do it. When I'm on a roll with this system, I love it!!! They even have one that comes with a daily bible readings if that would appeal to you. Best part? A year is cheap, $8!!

2. Steno Pads- So wonderful. I make long lists. Especially during my busy photo season. Each shoot involves a minimum of 12 different "things" I have to do. Even more if they order an album or something that needs designing. I have to keep track of these things for each client and for me the best way is a good old fashioned running list. I put everything on here, even if it's just "sign note for school". If it passes my brain, i put it down!! I am finding that I am a very forgetful person. I don't know if I'm stretched too thin, or I'm getting old but something is up. I've tried electronic, computer based organization...but no. I physically need to write it down and CROSS IT OFF. There is something very gratifying about looking at a list full of crossed off things.

Also, I don't start a new list everyday. I may write something on the list that doesn't have to be done for 2 weeks but every day I go back and look at everything that is still not crossed off and see if I can do that. I might still put it off...but I'm reminded everyday.

3. Hannah Kelley Downloads
I found this site a couple of months ago and liked it right away. She is funny and helpful. The one thing I liked the most was her downloads! (I love me a good download!) I use the weekly food plan, the account ledger, and the kids performance log. Check them all out.

One thing I've learned though...this is a work in progress. I'm never going to be cured of my organization problems. I will always be starting over and re-cleaning a house that has been "let go". I have to accept that, which is hard for me. I want perfection from myself and I have to let it go or my frustration with myself sabotages me. anyone else relate?? I hope someone finds something here helpful!! :)

A-Z Challange ~ Nicholas Sparks

2011-04-16T09:09:00.000-07:00

Warning. This is a rant.

I can't read Nicholas Sparks books. I know, I know. He is doing something right, obviously. Women the world over buy his books in droves. They flock to his movies...which are being made right and left. So, I know having me not like his books won't hurt him. Not by a long shot.

With that being said...I don't get it!? Why would anyone willingly put themselves through this?? His books and movies are beautiful, sweet, and romantic—and BAM! Life sucks, and there ain't nothin you can do about it! No rhyme or reason, just shit happens. Get used to it.

Why? Am i missing something?

The last movie of his I watched was Nights in Rodanthe. Funny story.

I love Diane Lane, so I rented it from the redbox. I was all alone, and honestly it hadn't caught my attention in all that time that it was a Nicholas Sparks story. So, I'm watching along....and lo and behold the BAM hits. I'm heart broken.

"WTF?" I'm thinking. Then it hits me like a message in the bottle over the head. "This has to be a Nicholas Sparks movie!" Sure enough...it is!!!!!!!!!! It was at that point I swore I would never, EVER read one of his books, or watch one of his movies ever again.

Do not try and talk me into it. Yeah, I love looking at Tatum Channing...but no. I'm not going to watch Dear John. No. Way. In. Heck.

I even thought The Last Song looked a little good, but I'm not going there either.

The only thing I can think is that sometimes women love to wallow. They love a good cleansing cry session. Yea, I get that. If I need one though, I'll just look at my laundry pile. Or my savings account.That should do it.

A-Z Challange ~ Meet Me In Montana

2011-04-15T06:15:00.000-07:00

My father died June 29, 1989. I was ten years old. He had battled a brain tumor for nearly five years. Five very long years. By the end, he didn't even know us and he passed in a hospital bed in our spare bedroom with me sleeping down the hall. Since then my mother has told me that God must have kept me sleeping because her screams were so loud.

As an adult with three small children, I can now appreciate the impact that this had on my life. I look at my ten year old son and can't imagine him having spent the last five years of his life the way I spent those of my childhood. It breaks my heart to think about it, and it makes me want to love myself and my mother a little more.

Less than a month after my father died, my mother, two year old sister and I packed up our new mini van and headed west on I-70 to Colorado. I remember hearing my mother tell someone we needed to get away.We had spent the week before preparing and one day my mother brought home a couple of new tapes to listen to on the way there. I was surprised because it seemed strange for my mother to buy something for herself.

At some point on that long stretch of highway I was curled up in a ball in the passenger seat while my mother drove. By then we had listened to the tapes a couple times through. I laid there letting her believe I was asleep as she sang along to one tape— Marie Osmond. It was country. It was okay.

My mother was a singer, she sang along to everything. When one song particular came on she really started to belt, and it turned into the most heartbreaking song I'd ever heard. I imagined her tears rolling down her face and into her mouth as she sang. Her strangled notes made my chest ache, but I stayed perfectly still, knowing that she thought I was sleeping.

She had changed the words to Meet Me in Colorado. When I finally decided to 'wake up' again she was happy and we continued on down the highway to our destination.

I have the entire album on my ipod, sometimes I close my eyes and go back to that trip. I know my mother does the same.Hearing the chorus of this song, always makes me cry.

A-Z Challange LOVE

2011-04-14T05:43:00.000-07:00

It's been a stressful couple of days round these parts. I'd like todays challange to be easy. I can't do a lot of thinking right now. (On a side note...does your wip ever leave you in a funk?? But, it's almost like you need to be there? Ok, moving on.)

Things I love.

My Husband.
My Children.
My Mother
My Sister, My Sister in law(happy early birthday!)....and all my other family.
Writing
Reading
My morning Coffemate
Roald Dahl
Annie
Fried Pickles
Traveling
History
The North and South miniseries from the 80's
Johnny Depp(it started with 21 Jumpstreet!)
Photography
Museums
Mail
Birthdays
my laptop
My bed when I've just changed the sheets
Roasted Asparagus
Shopping with no children
Good deals
blogs
meeting friends for coffee
Pad Thai...or any asian food for that matter!!
Drinking milk after something really sweet
Farmers Markets
Ratatouille
Redbox
Libraries and Bookstores
Teachers
Online bill pay
Historical romance novels
The smell of grass in spring
Vanilla
Cooking
Going to the pool
New purses

Okay, I've got a kid to get to school so I must stop. I suggest everyone stop right now and make a list like this. It felt really good. It reminds you of all the little things in your life that are really, really good.

Happy Thursday!

A-Z Challange KANSAS

2011-04-13T05:13:00.000-07:00

Oops!! I missed yesterday, please forgive me. I did think about it, and thought some more...but nothing came. Then, at a certain point I decided to forget about it, that's my prerogative right???

KANSAS

My state. As a child I thought Kansas was so boring. There didn't seem to be anything special about it. It was in the middle, flat, really cold in winter, and super hot in summer. It wasn't exotic, or romantic.

I was wrong. It is a beautiful state, full of wonderful people and perfect little towns. I've seen a lot of this state, and I've learned to appreciate all the beauty it offers.

Sure there are no palm trees, sandy beaches, or majestic mountain tops. But that's why I have so much money...to fly to these places! HAHAHAHAHAHA. (good one!!)

Sometimes, I will get to visit other places, but for now I love living in Kansas. It's home.

It's also home to my WIP, which is really special. It's so fun to write about a place you know and create people you end up loving to live in it!

A-Z Challange ~ Inactivity...and Incentive

2011-04-11T07:46:00.000-07:00

I need to start working out. PERIOD.
There is no way around it, it must be done, I must accept it. And do it.

A-ha! There is the tricky part...doing it. I'm great at thinking about things, not so great at doing them.

So, today I'm starting to work out. Even if it's just walking my dog, I've got to do something everyday. Swimsuit season is coming and this is my year!

I need an incentive...any ideas?? I mean, obviously the real incentive is the results. But I need something more. What do you use to reward yourself...and don't say cookies!! That won't work!

*EDITED TO ADD* I walked my dog for 30 minutes today AND wrote 700 words. I'd say that makes for a very good day indeed!

A-Z Challange ~ Hot, Hot, Hot!

2011-04-09T07:55:00.000-07:00

Today is Saturday!! It is going to be a hot one here in the midwest. The wetherman is predicting a high of 90. WOW.

Not a biggie, but I'm shooting an out door wedding today. eek. When I shoot a wedding I wear all black. double eek. Oh well, better than the alternative for the couple right?

I hope in your neck of the woods it is going to be a beautiful day. Hopefully you're not at your laptop working, your out enjoying yourself! :)

Happy Weekend blog friends!!

A-Z Challange GROWTH

2011-04-08T11:18:00.000-07:00

It can come in so many forms can't it?

This morning I took my baby to Kindergarten Round Up. *sigh* I have mixed emotions about this. Part of me is jumping for joy at FINALLY having all of my 3 boys in school. If you have children— you know what I mean. It is quite a milestone. But it is also very sad. It's the end of something wonderful, which is, being the only major influence in your child's life.

Now, if your child is in day care they may have already experience this. But for the most part, until your child enters school...you are it! You are the one that knows it all, you are the one they turn too, you are the most important person in the world.

School brings external forces into your family. Peers, teachers, awareness, smart mouths, other view points. It kind of reminds me of sharing my writing. It's easy to spend time with only your laptop, pounding away what you are just SURE is something special. It is safe with you, in your thoughts.

When you share it, you are sending it off to school. It will encounter criticism, judgement, and you will lose a small piece of it. Somehow it will not only be yours anymore. Of course, it will always belong to you...but hopefully by encountering outside forces it will now morph, sharpen, become polished.

Hopefully...grow, into something even more amazing.

I am nervous everytime I drive to my writing group. As I hand out copies of my work I feel moronic, naieve, clueless. Seriously. I am in Kindergarten here people. I'm learning the ropes. I'm putting myself out there, opening myself to criticism. And you know what? It is a beautiful thing. It's not safe, or easy, or secure. But it is necessary, for me to grow. That is exciting.

This August I will drive my 3rd son to school. I will walk him to his classroom while holding tightly to his tiny hand. I will be on the verge of tears every step of the way ( i already am just thinking about it.) We have had it good, him and I, these past 5 years. We are close, and inseparable. But I will tell him how awesome Kindergarten is going to be, and how fun it will be to have new friends and his own seat. I will pray that the new people in his life will have his best interest in mind, but I will try my best to be there for him when they are not. I will more than likely be swiping back tears until I get to my car and really let go.

However, after a couple of minutes I will check my mascara, call a friend and meet for coffee...knowing that this new life of mine, and his, is going to be amazing!

A-Z Challange FLOCCINAUCINIHILIPILIFICATION & Thankful for Thursday!

2011-04-07T08:57:00.000-07:00

Yes, that is a word, friends. A very, very long word.

Definition:
an act or instance of judging something to be worthless or trivial

Hmmmmm. I think I am indeed guilty of floccinaucinihilipilification when it comes to myself. I wish I wasn't, but it's true. My self worth ebbs and flows, some days are low. Very low.

THANKFULLY, I feel good today. I'm working on my novel, I have yummy coffee...and I feel good. I hope everyone else feels good too.

Don't fall into the floccinaucinihilipilification trap!!

* not surprising— while this is a word, bloggers spell check doesn't recognize it! :)

A-Z Challange ENGAGEMENT RING

2011-04-06T06:11:00.000-07:00

You would have thought since I was pregnant, I would have been expecting a ring for Christmas.

I wasn't.

Up until that point it had been the best Christmas ever! Michael had given me a Dooney and Bourke purse, a watch, and lots of other things he knew I wanted. I NEVER expected them all.

My heart stopped when I pulled the little box out of the tip toe of the red velvet stocking. Please be earrings.
Now don't get me wrong, I wanted to marry him. I just was not expecting this, and I don't do surprise very well.

My heart pounding, I opened the box. Shock is an understatement. I was dumbfounded. The ring was beautiful.

The center diamond was a carat. He pointed that out right away, as if it mattered! Ok, it was awesome. The second and third band were full of smaller diamonds. Total, it was over 2 carats and I was in love! I had never expected something amazing.

For the next few years it was referred to as "The Ring". If we went out as a couple Michael had to meticulously clean it with a baby toothbrush and a polishing cloth, which made me happy because it was an extension of how he felt about me. He wanted me to be proud, as proud as he was. Proud of us. Of course, as a man he wanted to show off his buying power. What guy doesn't?

Over the years, I didn't give the ring as much thought. I knew I loved it, knew it was beautiful. Young cashiers at the grocery store often made comments as I was writing a check or signing my slip. But, it had been over 10 years! I was no longer dazzled daily by it's presence like I was in the beginning.

Last fall, cleaning up my kitchen I lifted my hand to look at something in it and my eye caught the most horrific sight. Four prongs staring at me. Empty. One was slightly bent outwards.

In that moment, I didn't even think. I just yelled for Michael and told him what had happened. He was quiet, which was strange for him. I immediately began sobbing. It physically tore at my heart that this stone was gone. The thing was, it wasn't necessarily about the monetary loss. Although that did suck. But it was about the emotional heartache of losing something that represented us. That ring had become a part of us. Our story.

And it was gone.

Let's be clear about one thing. Money priorities change drastically after ten years of marriage. The ability, or even desire to drop a few grand on a stone is just not there. If I had a lot of cash in the bank? Sure. But we don't.

So, as I type I am wearing a single gold band. It belonged to my father who passed away when I was ten. It's special, and I love it, but it's not "The Ring". The beauty is, nothing has changed. We are no less married, and no less happy. But it does make me sad.

I wouldn't describe myself as materialistic, I can rock a Target wardrobe like nobody's business, and with no shame. However, there are moments, when I'm meeting someone for the first time, that I miss it terribly. Especially if that woman has a beautiful ring. It's not that I want to show off, it's about Michael. I want everyone to know what he gave me. I want to show him off.

Oh well. I guess the solution is to get my damn wip finished and try to sell the darn thing. I have a feeling the first purchase for my husband would be a diamond, I'd probably let him. :)

A-Z Challange ~ DISH CLOTHS

2011-04-05T05:50:00.000-07:00

Dish Cloths
Dish Rags
Kitchen Rags

Pick your poison...and I mean that literally. Consider this a public service announcement, and YES, this post is totally random!

I have a pet peeve, and it goes something like this.

Person pulls dish cloth out of the drawer and uses it to:
1. Clean the DIRTY counter
2. Do the DIRTY dishes
3. Wipe down the DIRTY stove
4. Lord knows what else...but I bet it involves DIRTY
5. PUTS IT ON THE COUNTER TO USE THE NEXT DAY!!!!

I'm sorry, I know this is my issue. But really??? Do you know what has started cultivating in that rag overnight? The fact that you may or may have not used soap does not matter. The fact that you used hot water to rinse it does not matter!

The ultimate kicker??? Remember when Grandma would do steps 1-4 and then use the damn cloth to WASH YOUR FACE?!?! OMG!? The smell was horrific. Maybe this is where that stems from. Tell me I wasn't the only one!

Happy Tuesday! :)

A-Z Challange~ CONSISTENCY

2011-04-04T04:36:00.000-07:00

Consistency.

This words is a biggie for me. The fact that the last blog entry date below is March 24th should be your first clue. Consistency has always been a problem for me. Is there an explanation? Is it nature? Nurture? Laziness? ADD? 3 Children?

The one thing I am consistent about, is my inconsistency. So there, I can get SOMETHING right!

That's not fair to me. I get a lot of things right, but I'm pretty darn hard on myself. I expect a lot. Therefore, I am often disappointed. When I am disappointed I feel frustrated and defeated, and then....I fall off the wagon.

It is ironic that I chose this word this morning, because it is Monday. Ah Monday, the birth of so many good intentions. It is also a (relatively) new month. April. To me April is freshness. Spring, growth, blooming, newness.

Therefore I am deciding now that consistency is my goal for this month. Consistency in my writing, my blogging and my personal life. I'll let you know how this goes...it should be interesting!

All over the place!

2011-03-24T12:40:00.000-07:00

My mind is going a million different directions today.

I'm okay with that usually, but today it's stressing me out. I really want to be writing, but I have work to do. But oh what sweet work it is....have a peeky.

How can I not enjoy that? I always listen to music while I edit photos, I must, and often I daydream about my wip. However, something about newborns is not jiving with my wip. Go figure. So, on I go, editing away. It's okay if I don't get any writing done today. It happens. I can't wait to show this family these images.

Which leads me to what I'm thankful for today!

I skipped last week but now I'm back on track. I'll be extra thankful this week!! Join the "Thankfulness" over at Oasis for YA.
I'm thankful to be able to work at home for my family. I'm thankful I have a job in which I get to witness the most amazing reactions to images like those above. These are priceless memories and I love giving my clients this gift. It is amazing.

I'm also thankful that it is a beautiful day out. Finally. I'm going to ignore the fact that my husband saw on the news this morning the possibility of snow this weekend. I'm in denial. I'm thankful for today.

Last but not least, I'm incredibly thankful for itunes and ipods. Steve Jobs, if you were more handsome I would have a full on crushing obsession with you. Fortunately, you look exactly like a computer geek should. My husband is thankful for that...he likes me to have eyes only for him!! :)

Spring

2011-03-21T04:36:00.000-07:00

I have never been so ready for Spring!! It has been a very long winter here in the midwest. Long, cold and wet. With that being said, thank goodness my kids are back to school today!! Yay, Spring Break is over.

That may seem cold, but I've found the last couple of years that I am not a fan of Spring Break. It's not long enough to adapt a new routine, but it is long enough that the novelty wears off after a few days. It's just...annoying. You're kids are home, it may or may not be nice enough for them to go outside. I realize that not every parent may feel this way, but when you have three little boys under the age of 10— things can get pretty stressful. Fast.

In other news, I wrote 8600 words in the past 48 hours, and that feels good! Very good. I did a complete POV rehaul on my wip and it seems to be coming very easily, leading me to believe it was a good choice. We'll see.

Has anyone done that? I'm curious, do most writers just have a default style of writing and no matter what idea pops into their head it automatically goes to that style...or do you choose based on each individual piece? Do you try a couple and then choose?

Oh, and completely unrelated...but these new Thick and Fluffy Eggo Waffles=REALLY good if you sometimes crave that bad for you breakfast food!!

Feeling the Story

2011-03-14T13:45:00.000-07:00

I'm a music person. A big music person.

I know it goes without saying, but music is so powerful. It has the ability to make you happy or sad in about 30 seconds. The ability to jog your memory, get you in the mood, make you mad.

Music and my writing go hand and hand. I think I may have mentioned this on here before, not sure, but I don't think any plot development has been created in my mind without the aid of music. Usually while driving in the car. We live in a small town about 15 minutes outside the "metro" area so the highway I drive in and out of town is where I do my dreaming. Characters are born, scenes are created, dialogue happens. All in my head, aided by what is on the radio, or on my ipod.

It's always interesting to me how this process happens. Sometimes it's the lyrics of the song. Or even just some of the lyrics. Sometimes it's the melody, or the emotion. Other times it's just that the song makes me feel like myself. Or the me I dream of being, and that somehow manifests into the building of my work. I don't know how to explain it, other than to say that there is obviously a piece of me in all of my characters and when music makes "me" feel, it makes my characters evolve. This is the part of the process that I love, and I'm all over the map when it comes to musical styles. Sometimes it's rock, classical, country, pop even folk I love. I'm a huge i Tunes browser!! The fact that they updated it so the preview is longer just about made my year!!

It makes me realize why some writers reveal a playlist to go along with their work. It can be so crucial to the process. You want to share it with people, to deepen their understanding of not only your work and your characters...but how they came to be.

I know I'm not alone in this. How do you use music in your writing process?

A song that is relevant to my current WIP is this one....love her

Tweet? Necessary, or don't go there.

2011-03-11T08:57:00.000-08:00

I have never had a desire to open a twitter account. Ever.

Until recently.

It's not at all that I have a desire to have my opinion or daily activity out in the universe, it's pretty much just because I feel like I should.

Which is why this is an issue for me. I don't dig peer pressure. It makes me feel weak, it stresses me out. I almost don't want to Twitter because I do feel like I should. Isn't that ridiculous? I also know myself. I don't want to add another "thing". Know what I mean? It's hard enough to write, blog, facebook, email, oh yea and I also work and have 3 kids. Oh and a house, and a husband. Those are kind of important.

So my question is this. Is it really necessary, as a writer, to be on twitter? Do you twitter? Do you feel you benefit from it? Does the good out weight the bad? And by bad, I think you know what I mean. Addiction, distraction, obsession.

Please weigh in on this.

Where oh where have I gone?

2011-03-08T12:59:00.000-08:00

I apologize for falling off the blogging wagon! I hate that!

I think after I was deathly ill there for awhile I overcompensated in the "Pull my life together" arena. My house had gone to crap...along with other things. I spent the past week or so trying to get myself organized. I said before, this is a "spring" trend for me. sigh.

I also did my taxes.....BLECH!! In the past this has been something I look forward too...but owning your business does not always = fun in the tax department. This year being the worst. Yuck. Oh well, it's done and over with.

ALSO, on the writing front I finally, (thanks to my wonderful Aunt) have Microsoft Office Pro on my laptop!!! YAY!!! I can now write from it, and let me tell you... 2010 is the SHIZ!!! Wow. Outlook alone makes me want to do a dance. I love me some updated software!! :)

Anyway, getting back into the swing of things and missed blog land very much! Can't wait to catch up with everyone on their own blogs!! :)

OH AND, I can't wait to see this movie!!! eek!!! I have not (shockingly) read the book but I'm going to before I see it. I LOVE chick flicks. Yes, I admit it. But I also love total guy, sci-fi, and historical movies too. This weekend is also when Red Riding Hood and Jane Eyre open up. Lots coming up!! :)

Endless Summer

2011-03-01T18:14:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend, as I let myself rest up and relax, I consumed this double feature by Jennifer Echols.

I really enjoyed it. It completely took me back to high school or even middle school. This main character started out a little behind in the social/feminine department so she came across a little younger to me. (Either that, or I was a hellion...both maybe.)
Jennifer seems to effortlessly capture the emotions of teens. The drama!!! She was able to walk the line perfectly at being very real but not being too grown up.

This book is really two books in one, first The Boys of Summer and then it's sequel Endless Summer. Both with the same main characters.

Highly recommend and I'll be trying some more of her books! Any suggestions?

And the Winner is....

2011-02-28T04:46:00.000-08:00

KAREN AKINS!!!!

My sweet husband, although confused why I'd have a "contest" on my blog, read each entry and very carefully considered his choice. I should have seen this coming. He is very analytical. He took the idea that it was a "first kiss" very seriously. He made it clear that Karen's entry seemed to feel most to him like what a first kiss would be like. So...here it is. Karen't winning first kiss! :)

“So…were you ever planning on kissing me?” I asked.

Real romantic, I know.

Craig Campbell ponied up, over-exuberant tongue and all. It’s interesting the details I remember. Our porch light was burnt out. We were the same height (not hard as I’ve always been a freakin’ Amazon, even at seventeen). Looking back from my thirty-two-year-old skin, I realize the kiss stopped meaning something for me three minutes into it. Hubbykins’ pecks and end-of-the-workday quick smooches hold more depth and passion than that fumbled mashing of lips and teeth.

But that’s not what first kisses are for, now is it?

Fun huh? Loved it Karen.

The other 2 amazing women who entered...Thank you! Thank you for being a part of my first contest, and thank you for reading my ramblings. Your entries were also great, it was a toughie! I'm glad he was doing it, not me!! :)

AND, I finally feel better. Seriously, I haven't been down that long for...well, ever I don't think. It was bad. I had felt completely out of control for the past week. Life has been stressful lately, and being sick on top of it was the icing on the cake. So, yesterday, feeling a little better I had to act. I cleaned the heck out of my kitchen. I mean took it apart, and put it back together. About 15% of the crap in my kitchen is GONE! (Hello goodwill). Of what remains, about 60% is in a brand new place. It's more functional, its more attractive. (It's a little hard to get used too.) But man it felt good.

I was telling my sister in law about it on the phone and she nailed it when she said "sometimes I have to start a project just to see something to completion." Or something along those lines. But YES! I seem to have so little control over so many things in my life right now. Or, the things I can control seem so big, overwhelming and hard. (Hello manuscript, how are you?) I just needed to feel good about something. ANYTHING!

And it did feel good. My husband thought I was insane. It wasn't even planned. I was just unloading the dishwasher and didn't have room for the last mug. That was it. I started ripping things from cabinets, and tossing things into a trash bag like a mad woman. Before I knew it every surface in my kitchen was covered with food, dish or appliance. Obviously, that was the point I was ready to quit. (Doesn't it always work that way.) But no, I was in too deep. I couldn't leave the mess, so I methodically arranged a new order and put it all away. Cleaning and vacuuming as I went.

Needless to say, I want and need to do that to every corner of my home. Closets, laundry rooms, bathrooms. I think I'm feeling the spring cleaning bug. I'm feeling it not only with the tangible things, like my home. I'm feeling in my life. The need to clear out some cobwebs from my mind, my heart, and my relationships. I'm feeling the need to be honest and put myself out there.

Winter to me is about hibernating in so many ways, not just physically. I emotionally hibernate. I don't talk to my friends as much, or my mother even. I go inward. It becomes depressing.

Saturday night we went to my sons Cub Scout Blue and Gold Ceremony. (Yay he got his tiger badge!!) I stood there talking to all the other parents thinking, "gosh it feels good to be in public and engaging with people." After I got ready and put makeup on, I actually said to my husband..."did you forget I could look decent?" OMG, how sad is that? Please tell me I'm not alone. Being a mom, who owns a seasonal business (winter NOT being the busy time) it is so easy to fall into a pit. Throw 165 snow days and a house full of sickness on top and you've got yourself a perfect storm baby!

I'm telling that storm to take a hike. I'm ready for spring. Ready for green, ready for blue, ready for yellow. I'm ready for productiveness.

I don't think it's a coincidence I fell back on that old ms the other day. I needed something fresh, and I'm in love with it right now.

Now I need to decide if I should take it to my crit group tonight. Oh I can't tell you how HAPPY I am that I have that tonight!!

Happy Monday!

Thankful for Thursday

2011-02-24T13:05:00.001-08:00

I decided it was important for me to participate in this meme from Oasis for YA BECAUSE I've been feeling so sorry for myself.

So, here it goes.

Today I'm thankful for the obvious, albeit very important things. A roof over my head, food, healthy (relatively speaking) children.

But, today I'm also thankful that I have many wonderful friendships in my life. Family, friends, internet friends, far away friends.

Last, but not least, I'm very thankful for my husband. He loves me even when I'm a total pain. Even when the dishes don't get done, even when I do some really ridiculous things! (There are many!) When I look at myself thru his eyes all I can see is failure...but he doesn't seem to see it...or if he does he just keeps on loving me anyway!! :) For that I'm very thankful.

Now- my body is telling me that a few more Tylenol are in order. Ugh!

On the Mend!

2011-02-24T05:40:00.000-08:00

You're back?! Thank goodness. I was sure that yesterday sent any readers heading for the hills after my very self indulgent pity party I threw.

Well, after many rounds of sudafed, tylenol, and sleep I feel about 85%. That's better than yesterday so I can only be thankful. As for this snow that is predicted? I'm peeved, but I won't go there.

I did, however, go back and work on my old ms. It was AWESOME! This is a story I had started years ago and left alone for a long while. I opened a brand new file and started in a brand new place. Even gave the mc a brand new name. I loved everything about the "new" old ms. The plot is the same...and I know this plot like the back of my hand.

It felt really good. Thank you to those ladies that encouraged me to do it! Now the question is....do I continue working on both or focus on one or the other? We'll see.

Bring on the snow...and PLEASE let it be the last!!!

Oh yea...only about a day and half to enter the kissing contest!! Give those 2 girls a run for their money!!

I'm going to end on this gem I had found a few years ago...anyone relate? I SURE CAN!!!!

Back, Back - Forth and Forth

2011-02-23T05:36:00.000-08:00

Remember that song? I loved Aaliyah.

So, here is the question. You're working on your WIP, but you have an unfinished piece that keeps bugging. It comes into mind while you're driving, while you're falling asleep, while you're taking a shower. Sometimes it comes to mind more often then the ms you're actually trying to finish. Or maybe, maybe, it's something new all together. Maybe a great new idea that you can't shove off.

What do you do?

Do you go back? Change it up, just get out what you can since obviously it is begging you too?

I started a piece back in the summer of 2007 and loved it right off. Wrote about 5 chapters and then stopped. For a long while. However, it has never left me. The story continued to build in my mind over the course of 3 years until last summer when I thought of my current wip. I started it.

Slowly, the previous work started to call me back. I haven't let myself open it though, and I'm starting to wonder why. There is no right and wrong in this process. I have read Keirsten talk many times about how you should "enjoy the journey" because once your signed it's a job.

It's not a job for me. It may NEVER be. I can do whatever the heck I want. But I don't. I'm considering opening it today. I'm feeling the pull. I feel like I could bust out 10,000 words today if I wanted. But should I ? Why am I stressing this?

Because I am stressed.

Being sick has made me feel despair. Don't ask. I can't explain other than to say...you know that feeling of being sick-feeling like garbage-then not showering for a few days-feeling like more garbage because your dirty-wallowing in self pity because your sick, dirty, and miserable-every dish in your kitchen is dirty-so on, and so on, and so on.

No? Never been there? If you've ever been home with a new baby you should know what I'm talking about. Especially a new baby with an older child at home. The self pity compounds itself until you have an overwhelming helplessness hanging over you like a cloud.

Wow, where did that come from? Well, you know where I'm at emotionally don't you?!

If you choose to never come back after reading this...so be it. Please do though!!

I'm just in a funk, and I think that's where the need to do something new is coming from. So, the question is...(wow what a circle to get back to this question!) should I go back and work on the old piece? Have you ever done that?

Tell me to stop worrying about nonsense like this.

Off to take a shower....and plot out this old story some more. sheesh! I'm even going to do my hair and makeup darn it! TAKE THAT 'sorry for yourselves'!

Oh, and DONT FORGET to enter the kissing contest to win Anna and the French Kiss....down below!!! Can't wait to get that book!!

Image source HERE

Sick and sicker.

2011-02-22T09:13:00.001-08:00

Saturday I had a very busy day. A day that I'd been planning for awhile.

That event came and went! (Thank goodness)

Then I got sick on Sunday. Then my youngest got sick with me. My wonderful husband took care of us 2 sickies, AND my other 2 boys all day.

But let me tell you, this sick is violent. It is BAD!! I hoped today I would be better, but this morning I just woke up feeling like I had been hit by a truck. I don't think I can sleep enough! I just don't bounce back from illness like I used to. Anyone else experience that sign of aging? Ugh, it's not cool.

I want it to be Spring.
I want to feel good.
I want the sky to be blue and not blech.

Is that too much to ask? No? Ok, I also want someone to come and deep clean my house!

Oh well, make sure you enter the contest to win Anna and the French Kiss! BELOW!

AH-mazing, a new design and a CONTEST!!

2011-02-19T13:08:00.000-08:00

Can you believe my blog overhaul? I found this amazing woman online...Rita. She spiffed up my blog. She is insanely, insanely wonderful. I love her!

She also did my business blog. If you need a blog overhaul....hit her up!!

In honor of my super-duper blog redesign I'm having a little contest.

I'm giving away a copy of the book Anna and the French Kiss. I haven't read it, but everyone who does LOVES it. So, I'll buy one for me...and one for you! Sound good? Good.

Here is what must be done!

In the comments section, write a paragraph 100 words or less about your first kiss. 3rd person, 1st person, however you want...it just has to involve you-another person (well maybe) and some lip smacking!!

Entries must be submitted by Friday, February 25 by midnight! Yay, let me hear it! My husband will be the judge- because I love him and he is completely unbiased and very honest. (And because our first kiss was in February, twelve years ago!! WOW!)

Go forth and tell your friends.

A beautiful day!!!

2011-02-18T06:31:00.000-08:00

Today is such a beautiful day. At least where I live. I hope it is wherever you are also! Isn't it amazing how the weather has such an affect on your mood? I personally have really been needing a day like this. I have a really stressful couple of days coming up. When I get thru them I'm going to reward myself by making the best-est desert ever. White Chocolate Bread Pudding. Yup, that's right. I'm going to reward myself with food. I don't even feel bad about it. Sometimes you just deserve it, right?

Happy Friday!!

image source. HERE

To See, or not to See

2011-02-17T06:15:00.000-08:00

Am I addicted to Shakespeare lately or WHAT!?

So, I love Trailers. I love movies. I love characters. I love...you get the point.

I'm not sure about this one. It's by the same director as Watchmen and 300 which both appealed to me visually. Sometimes visually is enough for me to love a film. If it inspires me as a photographer I love it.

This could be awesome...but I'm not completely sold. I do want to see it though. The acting seems sketchy, but some times that works. Does that even make sense? I have no idea what I'm talking about....look for yourself!

I'd like to thank the Academy...

2011-02-16T13:16:00.001-08:00

What? I'm not that important?

Ok, well I'd still like to thank Krista at Darkest Mind Before Dawn. Also Hannah at Musings of a Palindrome for all the lovely linky's! (which ironically included Krista!)

Anyway, Krista gave me my very first blog award!! Yay. I feel I've arrived. The funny thing is that it's a "stylish" award and thing are about to get a lot more stylish around here in a few days. My blog is getting a facelift and I'm super excited about it! In fact, I'm thinking of a fun contest to celebrate. Stay tuned!!

So, there are a few rules that go along with this award and they are as follows.

1.) Thank and link back to the person who gave the award CHECK!
2.) State 7 things about myself
3.) Pass the award to 15 recently discovered bloggers

7 things.....hmmmmm.....

1. If I could I would move to another country tomorrow. I am a wanderer at heart. Sadly, wandering is not conducive to my lifestyle.

2. My father died of cancer when I was 10. The effect this had on me is huge in ways that I'm only now realizing as an adult.

3. My husband is my very best-est friend in the universe.

4. I could probably eat some sort of Asian food every single day and be fine with it.

5. I'm a sucker for romance novels. I'll admit it. I have an addiction for the HEA.

6. I'm incredibly bad at keeping house and it seriously causes me a lot of sadness. I wish I was super organized and driven. Oh well.

7. The first full story I finished was when I was 10 and I only finished it because my mom bribed me with a Rick Astley tape. Wow. She is still encouraging me...but my musical tastes have changed!

Ok, now 15 other bloggers. (15...really?)

1. Dana at A Squirrel Amongst Lions.
2. Natasha at Writes by Moonlight
3. L.L. McKinney at Info Dump a la El
4. Plamena Schmidt
5. Ok, 15 is a lot. I have kids to feed!!!

Busy, Busy...

2011-02-15T06:00:00.000-08:00

I'm normally addicted to reading. ADDICTED!!

It's really a problem. REALLY!!! However, I haven't started a new book in about 4 days. *insert violent shakes* That may seem lame, but it's a really big deal for me. I've put it off so I can get some stuff done around the house. AND, I said I wouldn't start a new book until my wip reached 20,000 words.

Oh my, it could be awhile. I'm at 12,000. Yikes.

I've heard a couple of writers say they don't read all that often, which I can't even fathom! Sometimes when I'm writing a lot I give reading a break because I don't want another voice in my head but that is rare. I should probably do that more often though.

How much does everyone else read? Do you read while you write? Do you read more than you write? Does what your reading affect your wip??

Image Source HERE

The end of my rope

2011-02-14T05:09:00.000-08:00

EDITED TO ADD...a picture of the culprit!!! Anyone have advice on puppyhood?!

I have a puppy. We got him in October. I won't go into any detail but.....

God better send me a reason to like him soon. I'm having trouble coming up with any.

Happy Monday.

Holy Bride Batman!!

2011-02-13T14:02:00.000-08:00

If you have been reading for awhile.....( hahahah, I just started this blog in JANUARY!!)

Anyway, if you've been following along you know that my "real" job is that of a photographer. It pays my bills while I attempt my dream of being a published author. So, today I spent my day at the bridal fair helping a caterer friend serve food and passing out invites for a bridal event I'm hosting next Saturday.

Let me tell you....I'M EXHAUSTED!! Brides are hard core at bridal fairs. They bring an entourage! Oh, and working a food booth means you are busy!! People like to eat my friends...a lot!

I love what I do though, and hey- anyone in my blogworld getting married? I love to travel?

Happy weekend!

What a day!

2011-02-12T12:55:00.001-08:00

Today has been a full day and it's only 3:00 pm.

2 Photo Shoots this morning which went superbly and I wrote 300 words. 3X my daily goal. Oh AND it's warm outside today and the 40 foot snow piles around my driveway are melting!!

WOO HOO!!

Could it get any better than this?

Well yes technically it would be better if my house was clean...but I can't expect too much from myself. It would lead to despair. So, I'll instead crawl in to bed next to my husband who is nursing a cold and watch wipeout!

Happy Weekend.

image source: danny brown blog

To TITLE or not to TITLE

2011-02-11T08:05:00.000-08:00

That is the ques-chee-un.

What do you do? Can you start a ms without a title? Do you title it the main characters first name? Do you title it wip?

Do you ever come up with a title first and then plot it? I'm curious about these things.

I get kind of consumed with titles and I really wish I didn't. I can accept that eventually it (the title) might change but I stress it as I work until I find something that makes me happy. Anyone else?

Also....how does a books title effect your desire to read it?

Image source Kimberly Hayle

Critique Groups- A Wonderful Thing

2011-02-09T05:31:00.000-08:00

A few months back, after some serious divine intervention, I landed myself in a writers critique group. It has been so wonderful.

I think my work improved 100% by just going the first night. The thing about writing (in my opinion) is that there are just things you don't know until someone tells you! I believe many people can imagine and even write an interesting, even good story. However, what I'm learning is that really good, publishable writing is a well honed craft. Details, so many details...but I'm slowly learning them and they are starting to become automatic as I pound away at the keyboard.

Thank heavens for these 4 other women. I am eternally grateful to them. From what I hear I'm very fortunate to have my first experience in a critique group be so perfect. I'm grateful for that, because as nervous as I was I don't know if I'd have tried again for a while if it hadn't been a good fit.

But it was, and they are so talented. It feels good to get to know people and share a creative part of yourself and realize that you so genuinely want them to also be the best they can be. To desire their success as much as your own. The thought of one of these ladies making a splash in the publishing world is just as exciting to me as making it myself. And it will happen, they are all that good!

I have no advice on how to go about finding a crit group in your area other than just some old fashioned (ha) Google searching. I'm sure there are ways, but I'm not sure about them and I just seriously got lucky. I will say, keep trying until it feels good. Once it does, it is so very worth it!

Now, off to write and fantasize of a lovely Spring day. Surely someday it will come!

State of the WIP- and a little emotion

2011-02-07T15:19:00.000-08:00

clocking in at 11,048. Awesome. Things are coming along nicely, but I'm going to get serious for a minute.

Is anyone else out there scared to write sometimes?

Do some manuscripts just seem to awesome. (I know, I know) but yes??? The idea in your head is developing into the most amazing thing you could ever think of. You are on a roll, every time you get in the car and turn on the radio you are inspired. Characters in your mind are so mufti dimensional there is NO. WAY. you could ever do the idea in your head justice?

Hello? Hello?

I'm a perfectionist. I struggle with a first draft. I don't do first draft well. It mocks me.

I want to spew final draft onto the page perfect, and ready to query. The END.

Now, whilst you laugh in my face stop and listen. I'm not stupid. I know this is ridiculous and my logical mind tells me that this is not the way it works...for almost anyone. Who knows? BUT, I get frustrated with myself. Maybe it's because I haven't been doing this long enough. Maybe it's because I just need to force myself to work everyday and plow thru until I overcome this problem.

Now, don't get me wrong. When I do write and even when I read something later I don't cry when I realize it needs some work. I'm always OK. And often I'm pleasantly surprised and satisfied with myself....but often I hesitate to write certain scenes because at least while they are playing out in my head...(sometimes for years!!!) THEY ARE THE BOMB!!! If I write them, they may crumble and wilter, and die.

Please tell me I'm not alone. And yes, my husband does accuse me of the over dramatics!

Oh What a Beautiful Mornin'

2011-02-04T05:47:00.000-08:00

For so many reasons! Here are a few of the following in no particular order.

1. There was SCHOOL TODAY!!
2. I logged onto my bank account to find more many than I expected...YAY!! (I guess being snowed in your house for 6 years is not conducive to spending money...I'll take care of this problem in a jiffy I'm sure!)
3. I got some writing and editing done yesterday!!
4. An event I'm planning for my "real job" is coming along nicely. Wish me luck on that!
5. There was SCHOOL TODAY!!
6. It's Friday.
7. The Sun is Shining.
8. There was SCHOOL TODAY!!

By the way, I automatically wrote the title to this post without even thinking. It just came right thru my body out my fingers onto the keyboard. BUT, after it did I stopped. I was going to mention Oklahoma but for a minute I doubted my own intelligence on the matter. Do you ever do that? Question things you're about to put out into internet land because you don't want to appear stupid??? I knew from the depths of my soul that song was from Oklahoma. I could picture Curly singing it on the tv screen. I could picture the Curly from my high school play singing it. (he was amazing!) I was on the set crew for that musical for gosh sakes. (I made the most amazing hat for Ado Annie!!) But something made me doubt myself before I went there. I had to google it to be sure!! Does anyone else do this? Have a fear of NOT KNOWING WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT!? Good grief.

In other news, yesterday I worked on my wip. FINALLY! However, I made a critical error. Well, actually it turned out ok and it's something I often do if I haven't visited my wip in a while.

I edited the work I had worked on last. I try not to do this. I try to go thru and let it spew out of my soul without going back and early editing. But to get myself back in the swing of things I go back and read a few pages before I left off and I can't NOT fix things that stand out. It always improves it and then I go right in to the story at that point.

Anyone else do this? How do you edit? Do you wait till the end? Do a little here and there. Edit everyday? I love hearing about how other people work.

Also, check out fellow blogger Karen over at Novels at Naptime. Shes doing a fun little blogfest that involves writing about.....high school. True stories no less. I'm totally in. Should be fun!

Bereft of Sanity

2011-02-02T16:47:00.000-08:00

I just received the email that there is....again.....

no. school. tomorrow.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!

Since Monday at 5:00 pm, it has been me, my husband and our 3 BOYS inside this house. Our house is not terribly big. Our boys are not terribly good, they are terribly terrible. I'm going insane. My house is a mess. I'm DONE!!!!!!

Send help....you might get in our driveway because my husband is wonderful and shoveled the 64 inches of snow. I definitely "less than 3" him. (tee hee hee Karen!)

In the meantime, I have discovered the most insanely amazing group since I've had uber amounts of time to peruse the internets. (My husband says he is getting a feel for what I do all day...not said in a nice way...I told him "you have no idea what you're talking about, I'm hardly ever online during the day! pssh!" (crap)

Enjoy. The Civil Wars. (psss. It's free on itunes right now or on their site www.thecivilwars.com)

The song Poison and Wine is also awesome!!

$%&@# SNOW DAY!!!

2011-02-01T06:05:00.002-08:00

Another.
Snow Day.

Unbelievable.

The only beauty in this snow day is that my husband stayed home. We are at this very moment sitting at the kitchen table, laptop to laptop, working away. He's drinking his morning coffee, me my morning coffee mate. He can look up into my un made up face and my greasy pony tailed hair and smile at me as my kids run around shooting imaginary guns and calling each other BUTT. It's beautiful.

Is it any wonder that I love reading and writing? Taking myself away into another world? I don't think so.

Oh, and if you're wondering if I met my goal for the week you might have noticed my lack of post yesterday. That means no. :) But I'm on it today I tell ya! Sad part is due to the "snowpacalypse" the weather man keeps going on about, my crit group will more than likely be canceled tonight. WAHHHHHHHHH!!!

My apologies to you, my wip...and the world!

2011-01-29T08:14:00.001-08:00

Since my last post discussed my goal of 100 words a day, you might think my lack of posting meant that I was busy pounding out chapter after chapter of goodness.

You would be wrong.

I have pounded out a total of ........zero words.

Seriously.

Why? Well, like I said I went to this photography conference and ever since I've been immersed in my business. It's not that I don't think about my writing. In face I think about it all the time.

I replay certain scenes, scenes I haven't even written yet, so often that they have become real to me. Like memories.

I love doing this and it helps because when I finally get around to writing these scenes I know exactly what happens, the emotions, the looks. Everything.

Anyone else day dream there novels into life? I mean, obviously we all do this to a point...but I mean day dream them to death?! I have been day dreaming the climax of my next ms for the past 6 months!! It has changed a little. Dialogue has evolved, clothing, but the meat of it has stayed the same.

I often do this in the car! lol

Anyway, I'm almost done with photography stuff and then my brain can swing back to writing. Soon!

Manuscript Monday

2011-01-24T04:21:00.000-08:00

I have to be accountable. From now on I'm going to give the world (or all 9 of you) an update on the state of the Manuscript every Monday morning. Right now it stands at 9,936 words. Not very much but it's getting there slowly.

I would like to write at least 100 words per day. Soooooo, that means next Monday I should be at least to 10,636. Lets see if I get there.

In other news, my kids have school today. THANK GOODNESS. I'm so sick of snow days I could lose my mind. (Did I mention I have 3 little boys?) Snow days are not conducive to writing, laundry, work, peace, enjoyment, quiet, or sanity.

p.s. i love my children more than anything! Really.

How do you read??

2011-01-22T12:25:00.000-08:00

A few months back I was just a reader. I read for enjoyment...a LOT! I knew when I liked a book. I knew when the writing didn't flow well. I knew when it seemed effortless.

But still, I was just a reader.

A few months back I joined a critique group. I haven't been that many times and it has changed everything. I read differently now.

I read like a writer.

I didn't realize how much I had learned in this short period of time until recently. I started a new YA series and I have been scrutinizing it hard. The mechanics, the word choice, the flow. It's not necessarily distracting...I'm still enjoying it for the most part but I do notice things that I wouldn't have noticed before. Sometimes it bugs me.

Am I alone?? discuss.

BACK!!

2011-01-19T16:40:00.000-08:00

What a shame that I had to take a blogging hiatus when I was on such a roll. I missed it and all of you that have been joining me! :)

I was in San Antonio for a photography conference and it was so inspiring! Since my "real" job is also creative I'm struggling to find a balance between that and writing. I seem to only be able to focus on one at a time. It swings back and forth.

For example I got slow shooting at the end of the summer because it was soooo hot and used that time to become obsessed with my writing again. Then when Fall came back and I was crazy busy with work I didn't write for like 3 months almost.

I'm wondering if it is because my mind can't devote itself to two creative ventures at once, or I am just ADD and get distracted and can't balance myself.

I would like to make myself more organized and MAKE myself do a little bit of writing each day even when I'm really busy with work. My goal is to have my wip ready to query by the end of 2011...and with my business, 3 kids, a husband, a dog, 600 lbs of laundry, holidays, birthdays, family, and blah, blah, blah....I'm going to have to make myself do it!!!!!!

Anyone have anything similar??

On another note, does anyone have a running soundtrack for their novels as they're writing them?? I do...and this is a current one. Love it.

DOUBLE FEATURE

2011-01-14T14:11:00.000-08:00

What in the world will I do on March 11th? Red Riding Hood now this?? This is one of my FAVORITE books of all time. I think I've seen all versions of this...and I have to say this one looks amazing!

Oh, and photos are edited, laundry is getting there, bags are not packed...kids are somewhere in the house (but picked up from school!). It may be a late night...what am I doing watching movie trailers??????)

Procrastinating is my game!

2011-01-14T05:22:00.000-08:00

It's true.

I hate that about me.

How do I change myself?

Today I have about 80 photos to edit, a house to clean, 10 loads of laundry to do, a trip to pack for, a dog to take care of, a child to take care of, kids to pick up from school.....Ugh.

I've had all week to get some of this done. I'm tired of telling myself I work under pressure...truth is I become a frazzled mess under pressure...but it is usually the way I work.

So, I think I'm going to have to turn off this "fun" computer and only leave on my work laptop. Work has to get done today.

Morning coffeemate....check
laundry started...check
Child fed and stuck in front of a TV/gaming unit...check

Time to get stuff done so I can get on a plane tomorrow to a warmer climate with NO KIDS and learn how to take prettier photos! :)

(Anyone else a procrastinator? Or better yet...what do you do to keep organized?)

I love Books

2011-01-13T07:12:00.000-08:00

My reading obsession is sort of a problem. Just ask my dear husband...he could probably go on and on about this subject.

Actually no, he doesn't EVER go on and on...that is not his style. (This is whee we differ...greatly!) He would admit it's a problem though.

It seems appropriate to me to share my reading obsession here on my writing blog, because I'm going to guess anyone who cares to read it probably has a pretty decent reading obsession of their own. Yes?

So, I'm going to start by pointing out a few of my favorite YA books I've read the past couple of years.

The Luxe Series by Anna Godberson

First- I love anything remotely historical, so all I had to do was take one look at these and it was a done deal. I loved these books and loved the characters. Now. I had a slight issue with the way this series ended. I don't know if it's how I would have chosen it to end, but I have to admit that it was probably the right way to end. Make sense? Her new book Bright YOung Things is out now and I will be getting it soon!

Gemma Doyle Series by Libba Bray

I loved these. LOVED. Again, set in a historical setting but mixed with a fantasy world that becomes so real that I could probably draw a picture of it. In fact, just now I went to her site to get a link and she had a map of the school this is set in and it nearly matched what I saw in my head EXACTLY. To me that is real talent. She effortlessly makes everything so easy to see.

This was written in 1st Person/Present tense which I think would be soooo incredibly hard to stick with and to be honest it doesn't always work for me...but it totally works for these books. I was completely drawn in.

The Skylar Holt Series by Stephanie Morrill

I loved these books! Stephanie creates modern high school life perfectly and pulls a christian theme in without being unrealistic or goody goody. She doesn't leave out the ugliness of teen life or have her characters avoid it. Being a teen and a christian is hard and she deal with this so well. Skylar is a real girl, with real emotions and the secondary characters are wonderful, I loved and hated them at the same time. :) (Well, to be fair some of them I loved all the way through!!) I would be comfortable giving this to anyone I know between the ages of 14 and...well 100!

Her writing style feels effortless and it was fun to read because we live in the same town...which also happens to be the setting for this novel. :) Really enjoyed this. Oh, and Stephanie is a wonderful person and has a great blog for young writers HERE.

The House of Night Series by PC and Kristen Cast

On a completely different note...The House of Night.

Now. (pause for dramatic effect)

I'm kind of over the whole "I'm a teen, I discovered a secret power and am shipped away to a secret high school with other people who are weird like me and I then save the world."

That being said, this is the first one of "those" I read so I'm going to give it the benefit of the doubt. Oh, and I enjoy it so there!

(If you're writing one of "those" books...please ignore me. I have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about. AND, i'll probably still like your book. I just read too many of this theme in a short time period and had to take a break!)

Ok, on to these books.

I love that it's a mother/daughter team. I'm a sucker for a love triangle, and this is a love octagon or something. I mean, this girl is in a pickle when it comes to boys. (We've all had this problem right?;)) I love the world they have created, this books feels dark and the characters are yummy! I actually have the 2 last books to read still and need to get to them soon!

Many more that I could add...but my laundry pile is putting off toxic fumes so I must wrap it up! Any YA favorites????

My husband will not go see this with me...

2011-01-12T15:50:00.000-08:00

and I haven't even asked him. I just know! Which is fine, this one is a girl movie! Dark, love triangle, costumes...yay!

I know this trailer has been taking some heat online for "riding Twilight's coattails". My take is...who gives a crap!! I'll still go see it!

Sometimes Books Suck

2011-01-12T11:12:00.000-08:00

I'm a mother of 3 boys.
I am a photographer.
I am a wife.
I have a home to take care of. Point being...I have a lot of things I should be doing.

I also really like to read.

Sometimes, I start reading a book and for whatever reason- it's not working.

What do I do? Well, I used to just finish it anyway. I felt bad for the author.

"Someone obviously liked this book...it's published?" I would think to myself. "It will probably get better, I just need to give it a chance!" Or I would feel like I had already devoted so much time to it I needed to finish it to justify that time spent.

I don't do that anymore. If I'm not into the book....I STOP! I cant justify it anymore. I'm already lacking hours in the day, I already spend WAY too much of the hours reading or writing, (or internet browsing).

Recently I even stopped reading a book 2 chapters from the end! Everything that I cared about had already been resolved...I didn't CARE anymore. That's a big one, sometimes books aren't so much bad, but I just. don't. care.

I think that is a fear of mine...someone feeling that way about something I write. yikes!

What do you do when you're not feeling the book you're reading? Do you give that author another try later?